hermes/alcazar

Sit down and talk to me. Understand that I do not fear any physical object but stares and loneliness. I do not know why.

No.

All these eyes around me make my breathing difficult and harm my thought process. Start to realize that where ever I go there will be glances. I don’t want to go out anymore. No more beer, no more low self-esteem girls willing to anger their parents, no more of you.

Hurry.

How many times have I repeated “I can’t anymore?” How my paranoia increases when my mind isn’t sober is truly intriguing. Dislike being sober now. I can see all of my family’s lies and grieves trough their tone and insolent remarks about their life. I do not believe you. How can I trust a compulsive lying narcissist, whom is in denial of having a disgrace of life. One day you will comprehend that my aura of ignorance and stubborn is me reminiscing of time when your away from me.

Please.

How can I repay you for all that you have done. For all the hours your back was in pain, for all the hours you sat there just for me. It’s not tears, it’s just water. To this day I regret not ending that man’s life who dared to raise his voice at you. I was young. I was naïve. I was weak. But the way you see me in the eyes and tell me not to worry about anything is the best feeling any drug has ever given me. Please forgive me for not being the son you deserve, but be grateful for being the best woman I know.