Caveats strewn and strung Like threaded needles, more than one, Pushed once with care so tight**,** They cannot be undone.
the comma highlighted needs to be a semi-colon or a period ("They cannot be undone" is a full sentence), and I can't find a stylistic reason to break grammatical convention here.
Also, I am having a real hard time understanding why your rhyme scheme is so inconsistent. I think you should figure out what you hope to achieve with the rhyming, because right now their unexpected tinklings that throws me off when reading aloud.
the comma highlighted needs to be a semi-colon or a period ("They cannot be undone" is a full sentence), and I can't find a stylistic reason to break grammatical convention here.
Also, I am having a real hard time understanding why your rhyme scheme is so inconsistent. I think you should figure out what you hope to achieve with the rhyming, because right now their unexpected tinklings that throws me off when reading aloud.