How confrontation-avoidant must 9s be? Help?

I've been trying to figure out my type, and tests always give me 9. The description sounds like me, but so does every other type except for 8. I relate most to 6, 5, 2 and 4, in that order. Help?

The only thing about 9 is that I don't always avoid conflict. I'm an honest person, not in the blunt way, I just feel strongly about some things, especially human rights. And I will defend my ideas and beliefs if threatened. I will speak up if I think a rule is counterproductive, depending on who's there, I'd have to know them well enough and be comfortable with them. If speaking my mind will hurt someone's feelings, that is entirely different and I would definitely keep my mouth shut. Generally, I'm passive. but if conflict needs really must happen, I will do something about it, but I'll be upset afterwards. I also can't argue without crying, ever. I always cry. When I was younger and teachers would get angry with me, I'd always cry too. My mom and brother are type 8s and my dad is definitely type 9, which is difficult... My dad feels the way I do about conflict, but he will be walked over until he's squashed flat, which is not me. We have a similar attitude about convention and ignoring it, but is much more conflict averse. He is an INFJ.

So, are all average​ health or unhealthy 9s completely averse to conflict?? I am mentally ill and I very much doubt I'd be in any of the healthy levels. Unless that's somehow unrelated, which I also doubt.

My mbti type is INFJ (legitimately, not through an online test. Through study, with the input of people who know me well, and consulting experts.)

Thanks for reading