22 [M4R] Anywhere - The line between solitude and loneliness

As I type this wall of text, reason and emotion battle each other within my mind. For all I crave for the touch of a loved one, I realize that touch is worth little to me if there is no intimacy between us.

I used to be dull, wanting to get rid of emotion for good. People told me I was holding myself back, abstaining from being human. So I did the exact opposite: I let emotion embrace me in her arms, and fell in love with her. I delved deep into the subjective, and realized I needed art more than anything else.

Once I was done with the lack of what makes me "human", I went back to the same people for reevaluation. Turns out they still thought the same. Simply because I didn't fit into the norm for enjoyment, people figured I couldn't enjoy at all. I was and still am, both jokingly and in insult, called a "machine with no heart".

I used to merely enjoy science and mathematics. Cold, hard reasoning was something I've always been fairly decent at. Yesterday, the truth fascinated me; today, the truth arouses me. An elegant proof is the greatest piece of poetry there is, and the creation of the universe the greatest opera. Needless to say, I have decided to dedicate my life to the quest for truth: the life of a scientist/mathematician.

Why have these paragraphs been disjointed? The most likely explanation is that they mirror my own thoughts: disconnected. The last thing I want to sound is pretentious. All I seek is companionship from someone like me. I bet there are people there, and I understand if they're looking for people like me. I'd just like them to know that one of us has finally come out of hiding.

Come, let us be together.