Unsolicited "Advice"

Ever since I can remember, my parents have said things to me that hinted that they don’t believe I’m smart enough to make my own decisions. I often heard the phrases, “You really need to think about that before you get into it,” “Are you sure you’re ready for that?” “I just don't want you to get your hopes up for nothing.” As an adult, I find myself becoming more frustrated every time my parents do this. It’s worse now because they attempt to explain things to me that I already know; sometimes it’s over subjects that I have more knowledge in than they do.

Taken out of context, what happened today really doesn’t seem all that bad; My mom came over to see me and my kids. During our conversation I asked her what kinds of vegetarian foods they sell at a grocery store she takes my sister to. My sister is on a vegan diet for health reasons and my mom drives her there sometimes so she has an idea. Instead of answering my question, my mom lectured me on how unhealthy it is for young children to go vegan. I am extremely frustrated because I only stated that my partner and I are going on a vegetarian diet (not vegan)—and this is not the first time I mentioned this to her, it’s about the fifth time. And every time I have gotten into this conversation, I have gone into detail about how I want my children to make their own decisions when it comes to their bodies and that I will be feeding them foods from all food groups until they are old enough to make their own dietary choices. Their bodies, their choices, which is why my sons were not circumcised. Today I had a tone in my voice when I explained that once again and my mom just changed the topic... to lecturing me about another thing. In the past, I vented about this to my sister and she has been understanding. We both fluctuated from being the GC and SG throughout our childhoods so she knows exactly how our parents are like. My sister even told me to not talk to our mom about personal stuff like that (I’m assuming my mom gave her the same lectures too). I should have listened to her.

I’ve seen on some other posts that Nparents seem to think their opinion is the only one that matters. It just drives me crazy that no matter how many times you explain yourself, they either seem to forget it or they assume that you’re wrong.