Was I abused by my ex? [NSFW]

I'm writing this because I can't be sure what to think about what happened to me. I was in a 6 year relationship (17-23 yo) that seemed to turn abusive. At first things were great but then many things happened.

Things that happened to me:

He would sometimes just stop talking to me and only say "ok" no matter how I told him I wanted him to talk to me. Or he wouldn't respond to my messages at all. This lasted from a few weeks to a month at a time.

During sex when I said "No" he wouln't listen but just kept going and I just gave up. If I managed to make him stop I didn't want sex he would stop talking to me and sulk very much so I became too scared to say no. I was too afraid of losing him as he was my only close person (I'm from an abusive and neglecting family and moved to my own at 16).

Often when I was sitting next to him he would grab my head and push my face to his dick and put in in my mouth against my will even if I struggled and told him "no". If I pulled away he would just do it again. If I actually gave him oral he would grab my hair and start banging my throat as hard as he could even if I struggled and mumbled "no" and he wouldn't stop. It was painful and I often cried. He knew I had severe jaw problems but he didn't care even if I cried from the pain.

Eventually sex hurt all the time, I wouldn't get wet at all but he just shoved himself inside me and after sex I usually bled. He did not care about any of that. I felt dirty and awful after sex all the time and it hurt for days.

Sometimes he would start touching me when I slept and I just froze because I didn't know what to do and let him have sex with me.

At some point he would start slapping my face. He did it lightly but usually 30-60 times in a row and it hurt.

He would also poke my bruises all the time and it hurt alot. I always told him not to because it hurts but he never listened.

He knew I was depressed (I cut myself and was suicidal, even attempted) but did nothing and offered me no support. He never told me to get help, maybe because he did not care.

He would call me fat all the time even though I was at perfect weight for my height. He never said nice things to me.

I broke up with him eventually but I had and still have some problems that probably root from my relationship with him. I used to be unable to masturbate because even a light touch to my areas would hurt. I'm super jumpy and was very anxious in my new relationship. I was afraid of being touched. And a handful of other problems.

Anyway. I would like to know what other people think about this. Was my relationship abusive? Can some of this be considered a rape/assault or whatever or was I just too weak minded and naive? I'm sorry if I don't respond to everyone. Even posting this makes me very anxious.