Have i become racist?

Before i started watching Ice, i never said the N word once. Now that i watch him, i think i say it 100 times a day. With the hard R. I say it when i'm alone randomly, i say it while i'm showering, in the car while driving to work....I don't know what to do. Am i a racist now? I'm scared it might evolve into some form of tourettes and i might say it to a black person on accident because it's becoming part of my regular vocabulary. Help!