A Frenchman, Spaniard and Indian are sitting on the deck of a ship...

awaiting their punishments by the British Captain. The Captain approaches and says,"I have been given strict orders by the Commodore that the punishment shall fit the crime".

"You shall list the crime you have been convicted of, and I shall determine the appropriate punishment, which shall then be carried out by our Commander"

The Captain points to the Frenchman.

"Now then, what have you been convicted of".

"I have been convicted of attempting to escape", the Frenchman says, "I tried to runaway last night from the ships brig".

"Well now, since you used your feet to run, then I shall have the Commander count your toe nails", demands the Captain.

The Commander proceeds to count each individual toe nail and after a few seconds declares "10 nails!".

"Very well Commander", the Captain gazes down at the Frenchman, "then you shall receive 10 nails delivered into your arse".

"Get the Hammer!"

Next, the Captain points to the Spaniard.

"Now then, what have you been convicted of".

"I have been convicted of espionage", the Spaniard says, "I was spying on behalf of the Spanish fleet".

"Well now, since you used your eyes to spy, then I shall have the Commander count your eye lashes", demands the Captain.

The Commander proceeds to count each individual eye lash and after a few minutes declares "100 lashes!".

"Very well Commander", the Captain gazes down at the Spaniard, "then you shall receive 100 lashes delivered into your arse".

"Get the Whip!"

Lastly, the Captain points to the Indian.

"Now then, what have you been convicted of".

"I have been convicted of scalping", the Indian says, "I carved the scalp off of a British Lieutenant".

"Well now, since you removed the hair on his head, then I shall have the Commander count the hairs on your head", demands the Captain.

The Commander proceeds to count each individual strand of hair and after a few hours declares "1,000 hairs!".

"Very well Commander", the Captain gazes down at the Indian, "then you shall receive 1,000 hairs delivered into your arse".

"Get the Rabbits!"