one small thing today sent me over the edge

i had plans to go to the beach today with my brother and his girlfriend. i almost never go to the beach, despite living so close to it, so i got all sorts of snacks, drinks, booze, beach games, etc for the day. the plan was that they were going to pick me up this morning no later than 10am and we'd get an early start on the day.

from 9am-11am, i texted and called trying to find out when they would get here. i got a response at 10am from him saying that he'd be there in less than 30 minutes.

he didn't get to my place until 12:15pm. i had built up over 2 hours worth of irritability that had evolved to rage by the time he showed up. i told them to go to the beach without me. so they did.

punctuality is pretty important to me. i just feel like it's so disrespectful to take someone's time-- time that they will never get back-- and dick around with it. i understand that it's the beach, it's supposed to be a chill relaxing day without any timelines, but having someone stringing you along still hurts.

i don't have many friends to hang out with, and i was really looking forward to this. i wish people cared about me and took me into consideration. now i'm sitting at home alone, crying, with a shit ton of beach stuff that i'll probably never end up using.