I was due for a reminder of why I'm LC with my nmom anyway, alternately I'm sicker than you so you can't be sick

Obligatory apology for formatting since I'm on the mobile app.

Alrighty, so hi all. I'm a long time lurker, occasional commenter, and rare poster with a raging nmom, ngmom (narc grandma), edad with occasional narc tendencies, and younger gc brother who wavers between being your typical snarky teenager and ignoring all the crazy. I apologize for the length of this post, and I'm sorry if my weird, detached sarcasm in the delivery of this (one of my many ways of dealing with my family's crazy) is offensive to anyone. Admittedly, this particular incident is nowhere near the worst of it all but it's driving me crazy right now.

Here's some background information; (This post won't include much other than the current, ongoing incident, but I'm certain I'll get to everything else at some point.) I'm 21f, and my egg donor is a raging narc/hypochondriac who projects/projected munchausens by proxy onto her offspring (myself and brother). Father's mostly just an enabler, but he's had his shining narc moments too. Nmom was abusive in all three areas (physical, sexual, and mental/emotional), and edad would actively participate from time to time. Of course, she does her very best to keep up with her love of inflicting trauma. I currently live 7hrs away from the parents, in a gigantic city I love where I attend university and live year-round. I haven't been in their house since early summer of 2015, though I am still partially financially dependent upon my dad for things like health insurance, my car, and occasional groceries. He's the breadwinner and more often than not will take my side against my nmom. I'm a veritable master at dissociation and repression and I actively remember an estimated 3-5% of my life before 2016. The flashbacks are a bitch, but are generally unavoidable for me right now. Anyone who knows me and my life story will probably be able to tell who I am from the info in this post, but I don't really care anymore.

Anyway, on to the topic at hand.

I'm currently in Hometown visiting ngmom and doing repairs on her home. On Wednesday I drove myself from my city, and brought my cat with (she did surprisingly well with the ride), and I'm here until Tuesday. Now, I'm never thrilled to be coming back here but I do it because it's faaaaaaamily and there actually are a couple family members who live in Hometown I enjoy being around (they're all on my dad's side). Parents, brother, and I always stay at my ngmom's house purely for money's sake, which means I'm in constant contact with my family. I live alone with just kitty for company, so aside from the fact that I'm living with abusive relatives living with other people is just really hard on me. I don't have a guaranteed private space here, and I'm expected to be up at sunrise and working until midnight. Not even bathrooms or closed bedroom doors are safe from nmom, and I'm almost certain she's never heard of knocking.

Today is Day 2, and it's already gone nuclear at least 5 times. Most recently was just a little bit ago. I woke up around 2AM today because I couldn't breathe and had awful body aches. I took some allergy medicine to try to clear my sinuses and tries to go back to sleep. Around 11 I was conscious again, and realized that if I had any hopes of being any sort of productive for the rest of my time here I needed to head to the pharmacy to get some real cold/flu meds. At this point I didn't know quite how sick I was.

The day before this was quite catastrophic, and relevant so I'll rewind a bit and give a very brief overview of what happened. Now nmom's treating me like the scum of the earth or generally ignoring me, whichever is more amusing to her at the time. I feel awful about this and just want her to treat me like a real person with autonomy and authority in my own right, but of course that's unacceptable because I'm a lazy child who wants her for nothing other than her money (which is hilarious because she's a stay at home wife and has no money of her own) and I'm just soooo disobedient, good for nothing, etc..., and if I didn't want to be a part of this family I should just pack up and leave. I pointed out that there were no problems at all with anyone else in this house until she got back from the grocery store and started banging around all angrily and shouting at anything that moved, particularly me. It went about as well as you'd expect, but eh. I'm used to it by now. It's only made worse shortly after when she starts going on about politics. Now, she and I have polar opposite views on politics and social issues. She's probably the most racist, bigoted person I've ever met and despite saying she doesn't want to fight about politics so we just won't talk about them, she insists on turning on the most skewed-right news channel she can find and talks to the tv for hours. I ask her to perhaps find a more neutral channel or turn on something unrelated like food network or hgtv, and all of a sudden I'm an intolerant, liberal bitch who's going to run this country into the ground, but all of that's a different story. Needless to say, yesterday didn't go so well. At least I got by physically intact, which is more than I can usually say.

Carry forward to today, and it's more of the same. I went outside to let her know I was heading to Target and asked if she needed anything while I was out, and you'd have thought I shot her dog (whom she loves more than any of her kids) right in front of her for the reaction I got. I noped out of there real quick and spent a lovely hour wandering around Target. I got myself some new nail polish and a lipstick in addition to my extra-strength cold and flu drugs. I'd wanted to grab something alcoholic to lessen my outwards acerbity towards her too, but this Target didn't have a liquor store attached like the ones where I live do so I settled for Starbucks and went back to ngmom's house.

I'd also grabbed a thermometer while I was at the store, and discovered that I have quite the fever, so now I'm thinking that I probably have the flu. For me, fevers are generally horrific because my body runs two degrees colder than the average person's does so when I bump into the 100's it's far worse than when an average person does. That aside, anyone above 100 isn't doing so great and should be cautious. Not wanting to infect everyone else, I walked into the kitchen and had the following exchange with nmom:

Me: Hey, so I just got back from the store. I have a high fever so it's probably the flu, so you all should be careful to wash your hands often so you don't get sick too. My whole body hurts and I can't breathe so I'm going to go lie down until the drugs kick in.

Nmom: I don't care if you have a fever and can't breathe, I've got mono, pneumonia, and meningitis right now and I've had them for three months so far and if I can be normal and working so can you. Shut up, stop complaining, and suck it up and get back to work. Being sick or having a fever isn't an excuse to be lazy, the world doesn't revolve around you and it sure as hell doesn't stop spinning just because you don't feel good. Your father was sick twice over the winter and he didn't take a single sick day. You're just lazy and looking for excuses to get out of working.

At this point I just walked away and went to lie down with my cat because the last thing I need is to be breathing in drywall dust and 80+ year old insulation fibers. About an hour or so later she comes wandering back to the bedrooms and has a full conversation in that irritating baby voice with said cat, completely ignoring that I'm in the same room. The cat's sitting on my leg, so it's pretty damn obvious I'm present. You'd have to be blind to not see me. I'm also surrounded by an entire box's worth of Kleenex and empty cough drop wrappers because it hurts to roll over to toss them in the bin, so obviously quite sick. I pipe up and this is what follows:

Me: hey, I'm here too. You don't have to ignore me just because you're mad at me.

Nmom: I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to the cat. walks out of the room

Me, shouting after her with heavy sarcasm in my voice: Well alright then, just pretend I don't exist!

Nmom, shouting back: Oh, happily!!!!!

Where was brother during all of this? Downstairs, playing video games.

I've only got to survive until Tuesday...