Betrayed by RNGesus

be me

playing DnD in highschool, can't remember which edition, possibly homebrewed a tad

due to my being absent the previous session, my character was drunk as can be, and I had disadvantage on every roll I made

How we did disadvantage (I don't know how anyone else does it) is you'd roll 2 dice, then take the lower of the 2 rolls

get into an encounter, not that dangerous

party is doing well, me, not so much (12 gold's worth of alcohol is not fun)

eventually, It's my turn again (there were like 15 people at the table)

I have to roll d20 to hit, and if I did, we'd calculate damage off a roll of an attack die. I used a d8, If I remember correctly.

anyway, I roll to hit, expecting another 4

it's a nat 20

table goes a bit wild, but I have to roll again, because disadvantage

dear god please don't be a 1

please

roll another nat 20

table explodes

DM is barely heard saying "roll for damage" over the commotion

I roll for damage

RNGesus catches up with me

roll 1

do no damage whatsoever

And so is the tale of how I wasted 2 natural 20s.

This is my first greentext, constructive criticism is appreciated!