Source
r/vegan•
aeou_

Please help. I can't stop thinking about Okja...

I watched it yesterday and cried throughout the entire movie. I've been up all night (it's currently 6 am); I keep replaying bits of the movie, especially the mating and slaughter scenes. Additionally, I can't stop recalling other animal-cruelty related videos that I've seen. It's really distressing

Additionally, the night before I watched Okja, I had a terrible dream where I saw piles of slaughtered pigs..

I've been vegan for about two years. Throughout my journey, I've had days when I'll randomly think about all the cruelty that's being imposed on animals. I've noticed it happens mostly when I'm lying comfortably in bed at night; I'll just start bawling uncontrollably.

Has anyone gone through something like this? I guess I just need to feel like I'm not alone.

Posted Jul 16, 2017, 1:17 PM UTC · edited

5428
hulia_gulia•

You are a tender hearted bean. ❤️ That's what my mom has always called me. Personally I have to somewhat compartmentalism animal cruelty to a point in my brain or it will be too overwhelming. I actually try not to watch or read much about it. (I accidentally watched Okja before knowing what it is and sobbed during the slaughter house scenes). Meditation can be great like suggested above. Unfortunately this world is filled with horrors and atrocities (as well as so many wonderful things of course), so working at somehow coming to peace with it to a point psychologically while still not supporting it can be a tricky but necessary balance. I hope you get some sleep.

Edit: works to world and some other words

27
aeou_OP•

Tender hearted bean is so sweet, I love that!

I typically avoid watching things I know will upset me. Except for times I feel unmotivated & need to remind myself why I decided to make the change. I'm not sure I can come to peace with it, but you're right; there are so many wonderful things in this world. I'll try to put more focus on that.

Thanks for taking the time to reply. It means a lot ❤️

4
ColourfulBird•

Have you ever tried meditation? You sit still, close your eyes and focus on your breathing. Thoughts will come, but when you realise they are, just go back to focusing on your breathing again. Don't feel bad for having thoughts, just notice them and carry on breathing.

Set a timer for about 5 minutes and try it out!

It's really really helped me learn to control my thoughts and clear my mind if I start dwelling on sad things.

25
aeou_OP•

I've actually been using Headspace since late last year! It's great for guided meditation. I did try to meditate earlier, but had a hard time focusing.

You replying alone helped a lot, so thank you!

3
pandabunny388•

You're not alone. I've been a vegan for almost 4 years and every now and then I still just start crying because of the torture animals go through. Obviously I'm constantly aware of it, but I think it's normal for the sorrow to hit randomly.

13
miladymondegreenvegan 5+ years•

There is such a thing as "secondary traumatic stress," wherein you can (to a lesser degree) experience symptoms of PTSD without having directly experienced the trauma. Intrusive thoughts, depression, sleeplessness, and nightmares do fit some of the symptoms. Try distracting yourself, especially at night, with lighthearted books, shows, or movies, or a creative hobby, and try to keep your mind on those while going to sleep. Exercise to improve your mood and make it easier to sleep. If symptoms persist for longer than two weeks, seek help from a therapist or counselor. Knowing now that you are especially sensitive to such content, you should limit your exposure in the future.

9
aeou_OP•

Wow, I didn't know that existed. It's good to know though. Thank you for your suggestions. I will keep them in mind for when I need them!

1
suprchica90•

Thank you for posting this! I watched Okja last night also and had no idea what was going to happen. I was bawling during the scene she's brought to the lab, seeing all the other caged pigs, and when the baby pig is pushed out by his parents. I can't stand to think about the pain they endure :( I try to hug my pets more, help animals where I can (especially within my extended family) and find ways I can make less of an impact on the environment. Big hugs to you and your heart! I've always been super sensitive and made fun of because of it. Now I know it's a positive trait to have to feel things deeply and be filled with love for all beings.

6
aeou_OP•

(Just like someone previously said) You're a tender hearted bean too! Welcome to the club lol.

It helps so much just knowing that I have support from this subreddit. So thank you for taking the time to reply; it's helped me so much.

4
[deleted]•

[deleted]

5
aeou_OP•

That sounds interesting. I will definitely look into it!

I got some sleep & I am feeling better, thanks! ❤️

1
dumnezeroveganarchist•

Yes, and you should try to go for a walk and get some sleep after

4
aeou_OP•

I ended up falling asleep an hour & a half after posting. Going on a walk would've been a good idea though. Thanks for the suggestion :)

1
texasjackalope•

I cried through the whole movie too :/ you are not alone. It's disturbing.

3
comfortablytrev•

Hi vegan. We're working towards making this world a better place. Sometimes there's not much we can do and it goes slowly, but every day even quiet activism is speaking out for the animals we share the world with

3
jeremiah2911-•

My Wife and I watched this tonight. I was vegetarian for 4 years then vegan for a year after that. My Wife is currently veg.

Watching this story reminded me of when I was reading Animal ingredients from A-Z before every meal. It made me cry my eyes out. It was a truly moving story. You are far from alone

I got really sick when I was Vegan though. I think I was probably just not doing it right (I was in my 20's). I'm thinking of giving it another shot... Any thoughts ????

3
hulia_gulia•

Focus on protein and the necessary supplements (B12 etc.) and going easy on yourself for mistakes and I met you can make it. I'm doing the best I ever have after on and off going for 20 years ish. I'm embarrassed to admit the length of time.

2
jeremiah2911-•

Thank you friend, I just don't want to be involved with the death and despair of other living things anymore.....Much Respect to you

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aeou_OP•

That's great that you're thinking about giving it another shot! I'd like to warn you that I'm no professional nor do I know your medical history, but I can say that in my experience I've only ever felt sick and/or tired when I wasn't eating enough and drinking enough water.

Aside from increasing the amount and variety of foods, I looked into iron-rich foods as an iron deficiency can cause lethargy. (I discovered a new love for collard greens!) Also, do you know if you have any allergies? I've noticed that certain foods like tomatoes and tofu upset my stomach sometimes. Maybe talk to your doctor about getting some blood tests done to get a more complete picture of what's going on.

My best advice is to listen to your body. Drink lots of water. Eat a variety of fruits & vegetables. Make sure you're consuming B12 - either via supplements or fortified foods.

Good luck, wish you the best! :)

1
jeremiah2911-•

We took the plunge :). We are both stoked on our decision. Thank you for the guidance friend

2
alexmojaki•

Maybe r/eyebleach?

2
aeou_OP•

Thanks for this! My boyfriend used to actually send me links to these posts before I joined this site (I'm relatively new to Reddit and have not subscribed to many subreddits)

1
alexmojaki•

Welcome! In case you didn't know, you can get the most upvoted posts for a given time period by clicking 'top': https://np.reddit.com/r/Eyebleach/top/

2
alexmojaki•

Also r/MadeMeSmile

2
aeou_OP•

Thank you!! You're the best

1
FreightCraterabolitionist•

You poor hen :( Hope you're okay, it's a horrific thing to have stuck on your mind. Drop me a pm whenever you like if you want to chat about it.

2
aeou_OP•

I feel much better :) thank you for the support!

1
Justcallmekasey•

Actually okja got me back on the vegan train. I was vegetarian/Vegan for 8 years but fell off the wagon for the last four years due to various dumb reasons. First it was just eggs, then seafood, then only chicken, etc. And I fell into that mentality where in the back of my head I knew what was happening to those animals but i pushed it out.

I watched okja and it was like being hit by a train of reality. I cried for a really, really, really long time. I threw up in the scene where she's in the lab. I felt immense guilt for how i had lived the last four years. And I decided then and there to never hurt another animal again. I went vegan again immediately. As hard as it was I needed to see that movie to remind me what was happening all around me.

2
aeou_OP•

I've read several people's comments on the trailer saying that they are going to eat less meat and some even became vegan, just like you! I think it's a wonderfully-made movie that allows us to really care about Okja and through that emotional connection we make conclusions based on compassion instead of our tastebuds or convenience.

Wish you all the best!

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M83H•

thats the reality shock

2