Trying to move towards more realistic porn. Should I limit my fantasizing too?
Basically, I'm trying to slowly move to more realistic porn (possibly to none at all), because I realized a lot of what I liked about the stuff I was watching was the impossibility/exaggeration of it, and I was worrying that this was hindering my ability to enjoy real sex fully. I've been marking down whether or not I'm adhering to my goals when I masturbate, which is usually pretty easy as I just have to mark whether I looked at porn I wasn't supposed to or not.
However, I'm not sure how I should mark it when I simply imagined one of those off-limits genres. On the one hand, if I'm trying to enjoy realistic sex more, then maybe I shouldn't entertain these unrealistic fetishes at all. On the other hand, I am still getting off without looking at it, which suggests that I don't need the visual stimulation and could possibly just accept fantasizing about these things during actual sex. I do have my doubts about whether I'd be able to focus on the fantasy enough to actually make it worth it while still giving my partner due attention.
So, any thoughts on whether I should limit fantasizing too? Even if you don't have an opinion on which would be better, giving me more pros and cons would also be very helpful to me. Thanks for reading!
Edit: to clarify, I'm a woman. Also, some of the things I'm trying to avoid can't be reenacted anyways (or at least not practically), so no dice there.
Posted Jul 16, 2017, 9:42 PM UTC · edited