How do I stop?

Hey

I think I'm an alcoholic

It's not ruining my life or anything, but I still think it's a problem and I think I want to stop. Few times a week, I just buy a bottle of vodka, few redbulls, a big bottle of coke (zero, cause if I'm getting extra calories from alcohol I miight as well cut on the coke sugars right...) and drink my night away while gaming/watching movies/shows/twitch or whatever, then I usually pass out in my chair or somehow manage to crawl into bed and pass out there.

There's no real reason, I just do it because I somehow started one day and it stuck I guess. And even though I've said to myself I should stop it many times, I still do it. I'm coming home from work and without giving it a though I just go to the store and buy the vodka/redbull/coke combo I'm so used to. And each morninf after when I'm in the shower I reflect, and tell myself I won''t do it again, but then the next evening it all repeats again. I just can't bring myself to stop.

last time was yesterday, got drunk even tho I clearly knew I'd be going to work the next day feeling shitty hungover. Yet I still did it, I guess because the alcohol helped me forget about how bad I would feel the next day.

this is the closest I ever got to a call for help. None of my peers know about this cause I guess I'm too embarrased to tell them. If somebody notices that I'm hungover I just tell them that I was out with other friends last night, to keep them from finding out that I drink alone at home. Sometimes when friends actually invite me to a get-together I make an excuse so I can stay home and drink by myself

I wanna stop. But I can't. How do I do it? How did you do it? help. I can't go on like this anymore.