My Story of Crime

I was just a regular player, wasn't born into the special powers of DarkRP, didn't know anyone with the special powers of DarkRP, just was a regular wandering player with the basic functions who would just RDM and RDM and RDM other players and kept getting banned and banned and banned continuously.

I was a menace to the DarkRP society. Admins would see who just mass RDMed who and would see my name and know the moves over and over again. They would stand me up on the tallest building where no one would be able to reach and would ask me the same question over and over again.

"Why did you feel the need to RDM this player?"

And everytime I would try to come up with an excuse as to the specific reason of why I did so and everytime the admins would not fall for it and everytime I would try a new excuse.

What I was doing was the definition of insane. I keep doing the same things thinking a different outcome would arise. And then one day, I thought to myself, "What if I don't RDM people? What if I just live the normal happy DarkRP life as a thief or a gun dealer?"

So my friend was ecstatic that I was ready to reenter society as a normal person. He said he had an idea to help me legally transition into society by becoming a gun dealer.

So he and I create a gun shop by buying this really nice petite shop on the corner of a three way intersection. We set up a really good security system and we started printing like crazy.

While I run the shop and take the orders from the customers, he would be taking care of the printers and making sure they didn't blow up. And after a few minutes, our roles would switch.

This endeavor would last hours and we made hundreds of thousands of DarkRP money. And this endeavor would come to an end whenever a custom player with god knows what abilities came and used C4 to destroy everything.

Gun dealing was a stable profession, we always got customers who were happy about the low prices of our commodities, but I still wasn't happy, I wanted to do something exhilarating.

I tried many jobs. I was a cop, that didn't work out so well because I stopped cars on the street and shot the player when they stepped out of the car.

I was a drug dealer in the sewers, that didn't work so well since there would always be this one shit nosy-ass cop who would send the entire swat team to take over my operations.

Then I became a thief, not to steal things, but to expose and destroy a very as-I-thought-then malicious group: the Ebola gang.

They were the worse. They comprised of at least 20 thieves and would swarm the map raiding the small guys who just wanted to make a buck in the harsh capitalistic world of DarkRP. And before you say "Well those small guys should have had good security," these thieves were rich and always had a dealer on their side who would hand them a C4 during a raid.

The thieves didn't even need the money from the printers, they just annoyed the hell out of these small guys who just wanted a few Washingtons.

I then was determined to take them down. So I became a thief, had a cop on the line, and joined the group.

But I couldn't do it myself, I would be rammed in the ass so hard if they found out. I needed a buddy, so I search for another thief who was not part of the gang to assist me in the operation, let's call him Buddy.

Buddy and I join the gang, the guards mash the keys on the passcode and let us in.

To give you a description of how big the Ebola gang was, the gang had bought out the entire industrial section of the city. They bought all four warehouses in the city and set up an enormous amount of security. They build a multiple sniper towers and a secured bridge to connect multiple warehouses.

Continuing with the story, Buddy and I are allowed in to the building. The leader of the Ebola gang congratulates us on joining such a reputable gang and gives us the keycode for entering the base. I got it, I got the code. All I need to do is PM the chief police officer and convince him to bring every police officer and SWAT member to the Industrial section of the city.

So I PM the police officer right before I enter one of the warehouses.

We enter one warehouse and the sight is true heaven. Countless people have multiple printers set up. Drug dealers are cooking up m*** like there is no tomorrow. Buddy PMs me saying "Fuck the undercover operation, I'm making some dough." Great.

The chief police officer replies to my PM telling me "Great, we're getting all our police force to the base." Shit, I wanted money too but I just ratted the gang out.

The police cars arrive at the scene. The SWAT team comes a little later.

There's a silent standoff as the chief police officer is trying to get approval from the mayor to raid the Ebola gang base. The senior gang members are instructing us to take arms and take positions to eradicate the law enforcement from the scene.

I'm ready, I want the money and I'm going to fight to the death to defend the base. I set up position behind multiple sand bags. I have the sniper positioned on the head of the chief officer.

The chief officer gets approval from the mayor to raid the Ebola base, I was the informant, I relayed the news. The chief police officer used his battery ram to break the entrance to the base and fire erupts.

I take the first shot to the head, making a huge blow to the police officer. Police and SWAT try frantically to enter the base, only to be gunned down by the powerful weapons of the Ebola fighters.

The police try retreating firing their shots of anger to save the guns that they have, only to be stopped by the annoying remnants of what used be the security structure for the base. Every weapon is aimed at the block of police officers and SWAT members, every weapon is firing multiple shots over and over.

The showdown was a bloodbath. None of the officers and SWAT managed to escape the scene, the gang was victorious.

Everyone was cheering, the security was being constructed again, but now was the trial.

The leader of the gang was smart enough to know that there was an inside man to relay the information to the police officers. He looks at everyone in the gang, trying to deduce who would have relayed the information. He looks at my direction, I am nervous as fuck. He says "You! No the guy behind you Ravenclaw968."

I am relieved. The guy behind me is questioned mercilessly. He pleads innocence but then gets angrier and angrier at the leader. All guns are pointed at him now, including mine.

He gets angry to the point where he pulls out his weapon and every gun in the room goes off. He falls to the floor, such an innocent face.

I shake it off and start making hundreds of thousands of dollars from printing. Buddy and I are having a good life. While the Ebola gang raids lands far away, Buddy and I convinced them that we were defending the base, while all we were doing was printing and printing.

The cops finally showed up one last time, it seemed as if it was the battle of Bull Run. We got in a strategic position. I had the sniper pointing the cops again. We were ready but cocky.

The battery ram hit the security apparatus of the base. But I don't see as many shots coming from our gang as I thought. Wait, half of our gang was dead.

I was scared, the cops were pushing their way quickly and quickly. It felt like the Soviet takeover of Berlin in 1944 (1945?).

I remembered what loyalty meant. I took that sniper and kept firing and firing, but the cops took their shotgun and took a blow to my chest. I fell, gasping for breath. With all my energy, I pleaded to not be shot. The cops laughed, and took another blow at my chest.

My printers were destroyed, I returned to the Industrial base after a few days, only to see it rotting and desolate. This place used to be such a thriving black market.

I didn't know what to do anymore. I was aimless. Except for one thing, I always followed the path of crime. It would be one crime syndicate to another crime syndicate.

I couldn't take it anymore after one point. I took the car I had recently bought, drove to the beaches far from the city, looked at the peaceful water, and pressed escape, opened up the command line, and typed "kill."

NSA if you're watching this, this is Garry's mod, not fucking real life.