Just don't know what to do

Don't even know if this is the right board. I fight anxiety and depression so much. I cannot control myself. I drink to cope but it only makes the depression worse. I've been on and off meds for years. Seen counselors. Nothing helps. Exercise. Vitamins. Prayer. Loving wife. I have no reason for anxiety and depression but they remain. I'm so tired of feeling like this. I'm 40 and I just don't know what to do.