Is this abuse?

I think my father is verbally abusing me.

(This bit of back story may seem weird but it is necessary to explain the latest thing that happened). My family has two cats and one of them has gotten very sick in the past few days. So much so that we came together as a family and brought up the option of not going on our 2 week trip to stay home and keep an eye on her. Yesterday the vet called us to see how she was doing and give us the other half of Saturday's blood test results. After my dad hung up he told me and my sister (my mom was at work) what she had said. My sister went back to vaccuming the house as we were all doing things to help out my mom yesterday.

I spoke up to tell my dad that I would prefer to stay home so we could keep an eye on our sick cat, in case she got worse, so my uncle doesn't have to deal with all of this. I got out, "I would prefer to stay home-" before my dad said, "Yeah I know. You'd rather not go on a trip at all." (This isn't true. A family trip to Disney Land for next year had been discussed and I was really looking forward to it, but it seems this isn't happening from some vague recollection of a conversation I had with my mother). He's been calling me lazy a lot this summer I've been home from college and when I voiced my opinion that I didn't want to go with the family to my sister's high school to help out and get more serve hours, he told me I needed to do more things for the family.

So I've been getting sick and tired of all of this and I told him that I wished he would keep his negative things to himself. He told me, "I wish you would too. And I wish you'd do what needs to be done first before goofing off all the time." And something about getting up and out of the house. I started to tear up and headed to my room to get away.

I took a shower and just couldn't stop thinking about how I needed to not tell mom about this, in the event that it would make dad mad and they would end up in a fight. That hopefully this wouldn't make him lash out at my younger sister (14) if she made a small mistake. That all I needed to do was clean the bathroom and do what my dad wanted and then maybe this wouldn't happen ever again. I realized I was hungry and thought that if I cleaned the bathroom and did a few other things about the house, maybe everyone else would eat lunch and then I could eat by myself. How perhaps if mom had been home he wouldn't have said those things, and that if it had been mom or my sister saying they wanted to stay home he wouldn't have said those things to them either.

We all ended up going about our things and helping clean up the house while mom was gone. Once I was done with my stuff I headed downstairs and he was coming up them, so I was trying to get out of the way, but he stopped in front of me to put an arm around me and 'apologize'. All he said was, "I apologize if it upset you."

That wasn't an apology and I don't feel like anything will change. I've been realizing from personal posts on my tumblr from 3/4 years ago when I was 18, he's been calling me lazy for a while. I just go away to college for most of the year and forget about it all, and then come back for summer break and after a month everything goes downhill again.

I'm 22 and live with my parents because I'm going to college and it doesn't make sense for me to have my own place when I'm away the majority of the year because of school. (I live in Oregon and uni is in Indiana).

I'm not 100% sure this is abuse, or maybe I just don't want to believe it is because it feels like it's come out of nowhere or been building up so slowly I haven't noticed it.