Still kind of offended by this exchange

(Sorry I'm on mobile, bare with me)

Backstory:

So my 20 year old BIL joined the marines. He was living with my husbands parents at the time, but started being really disrespectful to his mom among other issues and she kicked him out. We took him in. We made him and my husband's oldest sister our sons godparents. My BIL started dating this 18 year girl he had known for a while. We thought she was okay when we met her, but we thought he could do better. Of course we didn't say anything because we're not like that. We were just supportive and tried to get to know to get passed our preconceived notions of her.

While he was living with us, he would bring her over unannounced without even giving us a heads up. Keep in mind, he's not even really having to pay rent and we're feeding him and doing his laundry. We had asked him before to just please let us know she was coming over as it was our house and we'd like to know when we were having company. Of course, they started having sex under our roof. I was really uncomfortable with it, but only told my husband so that he could decide what to do sine it's his brother. He told him to just be discreet about and be respectful and that wouldn't have a problem.

Well he completely ignored us and just was blatant about it. Whatever. He was leaving for basic in just a couple weeks anyway and we didn't think it was worth the fight. Our landlord found out he was staying with us and told it was breaking lease and he had to go. Oh well. Two birds, one stone.

Lo and behold she got pregnant and her parents were pissed so she called my husband crying asking him to come get her. We drove over an hour to get her and her crap and she moved in with my in-laws to get away from her angry parents. She had no job and was relying on my in-laws to pay her bills. She miscarried at 13 weeks and my in-laws had to go through a funeral home to get the baby back because the hospital wouldn't release him.

Her father asked her to come home after she miscarried, but she refused. My in-laws had to take care of her while she recovered, basically having to wait on her hand and foot.

Keep in mind, we moved into a bigger place with a much more lenient landlord and had offered to take her in while he was at basics so that it wasn't a strain on my in-laws. You see, my in-laws have 13 kids including my husband (the oldest) and they have one on the way. My FIL also lives in a city 500 miles away 5 days out of the week and comes home on weekends. So they have enough on their plate, but no she wouldn't feel comfortable imposing and just wanted to stay there.

So after all this and many other instances of bending over backward for them to help and be supportive, his brother returns from basics and is just a complete prick to my husband. He doesn't take it personally because he knows that he had just found out she lost the baby. He let it go.

I became pregnant by surprise and ended up getting out on bed rest for severe pain and exhaustion. She had been begging for a nanny job on Facebook for like three weeks before and hadn't found anything. We again offered to let her come live in with us for free room and board plus a salary to be my sons nanny while I was on bed rest. She never returned our call and I ended up figuring out how to handle it on my own. That was three weeks ago.

My in-laws had two vehicles. My FILs truck was stolen, so they were essentially down to one vehicle. They did have my BILs little two-seater Toyota pickup, but that's only really helpful in an emergency. They gave the one working car that could actually fit a few kids to my FIL to drive to work.

Finally, she called us back this last Monday asking when she could start. We told her we didn't need help any more, that we really needed it when we originally asked but we had made it work since she didn't seem interested. She was fine with it and went on.

This brings us to last week:

Her car broke down while she driving to her old city to visit friends. My husband, former mechanic, had told her not to drive it that far because it needed work and it wasn't safe. She topped it out at 120mph and it overheated over an hour and a half away from my in-laws. She called friends of ours and asked them to come get her. They called us and asked for my husband's help. He was in the middle of stuff he needed to get done on our house, but agreed anyway because family.

I had assumed she had already spoken with my mother in law, who she lives with, so I called her to coordinate and let her know we were going to go pick her up. I hadn't spoken to my BILs girlfriend yet, so I called her to let her know we were on our way. The conversation went as follows:

Me: Hey what's going on? GF: I'm fucking broke down on the side of the highway!! Me: Where are you at? GF: (tells me she's in her old city) Why are you calling me? Who told you about this?! Me: (Mutual friend) called and said you needed (Husband) to drive the mustang back. I was just calling to let you know- GF: I got a tow truck on my policy and a friend coming to get me. Don't worry about it. I gotta call (mutual friend) and let him know I don't need him. Me: Okay, be careful. Let us know if we- She hangs up on me.

Okay. Kinda rude, but I get it. She's stressed and broken down on the highway in the middle of summer. I text my MIL to let her know that she had it under control and never mind.

About five hours after the whole ordeal, the girlfriend sends me this message and after an hour of being just taken aback and upset, you can see how I responded. My husband was pissed. He wanted to go off on her. I didn't want my MIL to have to deal with the drama and so I just responded the way I did.

Thing is, it's been a few days and I'm still really pissed about it. She was really rude to me for no reason at all. My husband and I have gone out of our way to help her and she's just kept acting like this. I don't really know how to handle it.

Sorry this was so long, I just really needed to vent and get some advice from y'all.

TL;DR BIL girlfriend has some trouble and we try to help. She gets mad and sends me a lecturing text message. Husband gets mad. I shrug it off, but I'm still upset.

Edit: forgot to add that she also posted this sweet thank you to the mutual friends and my MIL for helping her.