Ready to kill myself basically. Hate to beg but please just talk to me

Tried drinking tonight to go out even failed at that. 27 years old, master's degree looming. A virgin. My panic disorder peaked as I started university, causing me to become a recluse for years. I was bullied heavily and because of that it never even occurred to me that I was worthy of anything, that anyone would love me. Got in shape, got a six pack for a time, didn't do shit because I couldn't be a person, I couldn't go out even because of my social anxiety.. I have an elite starting job out of school that I'm starting, my university was the best in the country.. and I just stayed at home and when I did go out I never got laid. Women my age are aging fast, I'll have fuck all left soon. Nothing but work stress and misery to look forward to. No family because I never talk to anyone. Muscles don't do shit in that position. I'm so tired of life, I do things but never meet women, never even having kissed anyone at 27 why wouldn't I just end it right here?? I will never do anything