Why do many of us turn to self-pity in times of difficulty rather than facing our issues and remaining hopeful? Is it easier to just live in self pity? Or does it simply feel good to be self loathing?

I've noticed many of the really low SMV incel types on here turn to self pity and post the "it'll never get better" types of threads. I myself have encountered these feelings that the idea of me improving my life and being desirable to a woman is inconceivable. I do my best to not let these thoughts fester but it can be difficult at times. Even writing this post makes those thoughts start to initiate. The only things I can do which prevents these thoughts from initiating is to remain busy and constantly say outrageously overly positive things to my self.

Why do we do this? Are those who think/behave like this just weak people? Does self pity feel good or is it just a easier option than putting in the hard work? Is this just quitter mentality?