Student Journalist struggles - focusing on one point in a story

Hi all,

A few notes about myself; I'm Austrian, moved two years ago to London to study Fashion Journalism. I enjoy my course and I definitely want to pursue a career as a freelancer as soon as I graduate. Besides the constant struggle with my English grammar and basically thinking in my native language (I think in German when I write and this messes up my structure) I found it difficult to focus on one point in my story. Each time when I got my assessment feedback back I had my teacher complaining about my structure and weak focus on the main point of the article. I have been told that reading good journalism on a daily basis (which I do everyday twice morning and evening) would help me improve that. For example, recently I wrote a feature story on body diversity representation in fashion, that was my main idea on how I wanted to write the piece, but the final draft ended up including paragraphs that focused on the influence of social media representation in fashion. Somehow I thought I could connect the two, but when I asked a journalist friend she pointed out that the the story is unclear and not precisely enough focused. Now that I'm trying to work on it, I was hoping for advice. I would really like to improve my writing structure or let's say my approach on how I balance a feature story correctly. Do you have any tips, book recommendations or articles that I could look up?

Thanks in advance, Bella