I kind of reached the end...

Well, my plan to get to a hospital for two weeks of psychotherapy had failed. They only offered me a room for a single person which costs too much. Only double rooms are free and they do not have any free spots there. Also my family is ignoring and not caring. I mean, my brother is not talking to me since I came out. My mother is kind of talking to me, but she is spending all her time in the other room with my brother and is avoiding conversation as much as possible. She even did not want to come and take me home from the bus station (9km away). My best friend is ignoring me, doesn't want to spend time with me anymore. So I have absolutely no one left in this world. And no one does really care or need me anymore. I know that everyone starts to love you once you are gone, but I need those people while I am alive. And it does not seem like they need me. So what else I have left to do. I am thinking about this very calmly, no hysteria or tears anymore. I am not sure if I am going to warn anyone about it this time. Like... I believe I've really had enough. And so have had others. :)