You got this: Why You're Going to be okay

Quick context: I was seeing this guy, he cheated on me. It was really bad - it hit extra hard because we were friends before. I always figured even if things fell apart, we would be able to end things respectfully. This happened within the last 3 months, and since then, I’ve been working on myself. I feel like I’ve done pretty well - I believe that he has shit he needs to work through and none of it was my fault, he’s fully responsible, I’m going to be just fine. It’s been a learning experience, and I feel like I’m all the stronger for it. I’ve been doing no contact, and it was hard at first, but I'm stubborn. I’ve maintained it.

Next week, I have to see him at an event with the girl he cheated on me with. It’s a really important event to me, and I am not going to miss it for him.

This is my pep talk to myself, to mentally prepare. I wrote this out, and read it to myself out loud 3 times. It helped settle something inside me. I hope it helps someone else too.

A LOVE LETTER TO MYSELF:

You got this. You are stronger than this, and you are better than this. He is not even close to your match. You are stronger than you ever imagined.

Through his actions, he has made you put everything to the test. Your self-worth and confidence, your integrity, your compassion, your resilience. Your patience. He has made you question all of it. And you are passing with flying colours. Not once did you let him make you do something that you would be ashamed of. You've conducted yourself as gracefully as possible through an incredibly difficult and emotionally-trying period, and so you are WINNING THIS. You aren’t treating this like a who-can-move-on-faster contest. You aren’t lowering your standards. You are winning this in the best way possible.

You have more balls than he ever had. Your reward will be the fact that you have no regrets - while he will have plenty.

When you see him, don't be upset with him, because he's not worth it. He’s fucking terrified, and he doesn't know what he's doing, or what he wants - he even told you so. So don't be swayed by appearances. If he looks like he’s doing okay, don’t feel bitter. Remind yourself that you don’t hate him - you want the best for both of you, whatever that means.

When you see her, don't be upset or mad about her. She doesn't even know anything. If anything, feel bad for her that she has no idea. Do you believe for a second that he's telling her the truth? That he has the balls to be honest with her about who he is? So don't you dare feel insecure in any way when you lay eyes on her.

Remember that you are a QUEEN. He did this to you, but you are far from powerless. You are strong enough to crush his universe. But kind enough not to. You are compassionate enough to make him lower his eyes in shame.

So focus on yourself. Focus on how much you're learning, how good your life is, how lucky you are to have the people you do in your life. Take care of the ones you care about, and keep your heart open. Remember that there are many stories still ahead.

You are fully in control of you own fate, and no one can make you feel bad if you don’t let them. YOU GOT THIS. <3