To punish humans, I'm eliminating sex!
smbc-comics.com/index.php?db=comics&id=1366
smbc-comics.comPosted Dec 6, 2008, 10:24 AM UTC
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smbc-comics.comDon't forget to hover over the red button for a bonus comic. I think it's called a Viewty or something...
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Holy crap, I never knew about that. Now I have to go back and read all the comics again.
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It's funny how someone says this every single time it's pointed out.
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Holy crap, I never knew about that. Now I have to go back and read all the comic threads again.
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Votey.
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Something about smbc never really resonated with me. But that cracked me up.
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Thanks! (I always do forget.)
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If anything like the Judeo-Christian God actually existed, I would stop at nothing to kill It.
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He had a crush on my mother for years! (She was President of NY Mensa and he used to do events for them, so they hung out a fair bit.)
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Isaac Asimov had a crush on your mother?
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Yeah, it was cute!
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This is like the Da Vinci Code! Helleborus is the son of Asimov!
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Did you know he had teh AIDS!!
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My head asplode.
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As good as this story is, "The Last Question" is much better...
The Nine Billion Names of God is also a favorite of mine.
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Aha! I read that when I was young, and it had a great impact on me and how I viewed the concept of God.
What a delight to read it again.
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Indeed, I read it again after I posted it... It also has one of the two best last sentences I've ever read in stories (the other one was in The Last Question), but this one is also very poetic as well as surprising.
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Note to self: read more Asimov.
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Thank you so much. I've been looking for this story for years. I now imagine that every time I almost re-discovered it I just assumed that it was "The Last Question" and kept looking.
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Sometimes Asimov was on, sometimes he wasn't. This was great, but The Last Question was amazing.
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Why?
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This is especially justified when god turns out to be a golden Loc-Nar.
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This punishment wouldn't change anything for redditors.
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Hey, give us some credit. Some of us still hope to, one day, have sex
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smbc comics never get old
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They never get good, either.
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Probably needs more stick figures for your approval.
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I remember that one -- when jerry got a hold of that tank, and they tried to summons angels, but then when they fired the first shell, it got lodged in the gun's shaft and exploded, firing shrapnel back into the base of the tank and leaving a quarter sized hole in George's head.
Man -- what a good show -- observational humor at its best!
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Nietzsche would be so proud.
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I'm the kind of person who looks at pictures first before reading the text. When I saw the darker woman and white guy in bed, I thought this would have something to do with interracial sex, or gay rights being equated to interracial marriage, or something. Just goes to show how biases work. Maybe the future will be a better place and dumbasses like me will no longer notice the races of people in cartoons or automatically correlate two things based on what we've observed in the past.
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this was absolutely freaking amazing!!!
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God looks like a tortilla.
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And lo the lord did sayeth, "Let there be quesadillas in my honor." And there was much rejoice.
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NO THAT'S A BAD IDEA TO EVEN JOKE ABOUT GUYS. KING JESUS WOULD NEVER ALLOW SPACE VEHICLES TO EVEN BE INVENTED AND BECAUSE HE IS ALL POWERFUL HE WOULD KNOW THEY WERE BEING WORKED ON AND WOULD PUT A STOP TO IT. THE LORD GOD MIGHT NOT FIND THIS TYPE OF COMIC SO FUNNY- BE SAFE AND DOWNVOTE IT- OR CHRIST JESUS MIGHT DECIDE TO DOWNVOTE YOU.
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subtle.
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You just gave me an idea for a movie...Jesus in Spaaaaaaccccccce
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It would pretty much follow on what happened at the end of the Bible.
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Sometimes I think there is an overemphasis on the value of the physical act of sex.
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Sometimes I think you're turning into a woman.
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Indeed. I was at a point where I was banging a different guy every other day, and I still felt like shit until I found the one I loved.
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Reminds me of that star trek movie where they kill god.
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Ahh, that's why there were no sex scenes!
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I'd take asexuality over all this frustration any fucking day of the week.
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All you need is a scalpel and some local anaesthetic and your dreams could come true.
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So, does the last frame take place two months after sex is eliminated -- or two months, two weeks, two days, and two seconds?
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Finally SMBC gets over itself and does something worthwhile. Even a blind pig finds an acorn now and then.
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Whose sexual organs did god eliminate.
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Well...sorry, but now you will have to change your Reddit name to Jimmy.
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Both? Or just got rid of the feeling.
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It should read "masturbation"
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If the FSM wanted to eliminate sex, he could just make everyone get married. (Or so I have heard)
What the fuck is with this constant refrain of "no one has sex after marriage"? Do people seriously believe this bullshit?
ETA: Thanks to the commenters who pointed out that it's not marriage that cuts down on sex, it's having children. That seems fairly accurate.
Further edit: It's been really fun to watch this comment's score swing wildly up and down past zero. The best min/max I've seen so far is -8/19.
I'm only making a (bad) joke, based upon what I've heard comics say. But I wouldn't actually know, never having been married. And yes, some people do believe it, in a kind of fatalistic, suspicious way. But if you have found the opposite to be true in your personal life, WHY do you need to ADVERTISE it?
Do you WANT to make us alone, unhappily single people feel even more depressed?
Don't act like a effin' pimp, tellin' us all how good an' tasty she is!
So you're gettin' some. Good for you...now STF...I mean...bye, take care!
:-)
Advertising it could help people break out of the notion that it doesn't happen, so they might be less likely to fall into that self-fulfilling trap themselves.
I'm not married. But I know married people who have plenty of sex.
I know married people who have plenty of sex with people who aren't.
yes.
I got married and we went from having sex 3-4 times a week to maybe once a month.
I'm now divorced.
You lucky SOB - the last time I slept in the same bed as my partner was four years ago. Thank god for the internet.
christ. thank god for hookers
Why would you want to sleep in the same bed. I've always found sleeping with women annoying. Sometimes they even snore.
Couples might slow down once married, but that happens as relationships age, whether married or not. Married people with healthy sex lives have sex more often than most single people, especially as you get older.
Oh really 'healthy sex lives' ? So not fucking causes cancer?
Yes.
My sperm cures cancer and you have face cancer I'm afraid.
Its true. In the beginning of the marriage you have sex a lot, then it starts to taper. Once you have a kid, you literally have no sex for months around the pregnancy. Then its back somewhat, but on an erratic schedule. Till the baby is around 1.5-2 years, its like that. Then this gives rise to a new less frequent schedule that is now established. Thats where I am...
It's actually because I'm fucking your wife and it's hard for her to fit you in. Thanks for raising my brat btw.
Did you know that thats how you were born. Ask your mom.
Congratulations on your recent marriage.
Yes, yes we do. My parents hated each other and I am fairly certain that they rarely (if ever) had sex after I and my siblings were born. I'm sure it's possible for a marriage to involve lots of awesome sex but I'm too terrified of ending up like them to even think about it.
Yeah, it dries up after they have a kid, come on get it right.
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Are you a fellow SWM (sex while married)?
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Could someone Re-host this somewhere, my IP is blocking this website.
Could someone change my connection somewhere, this website is blocking my ISP.
Or just have them date for 6 months.
If the sex dries up after 6 months, you're doing it wrong.
Yes, if you don't drill deep enough you'll only catch the top edge of the sex and it can dry up quickly. When you drill deep and then augment that with slantwise drilling you'll have more sex then you know what to do with and it can be pumped for years and years before it even begins to slow down.
Don't forget about about extracting sex from non-traditional sources. Some will only pump sex from places literally bursting with sex but this soon dries up, If you go for the sex-shale the little bit of extra effort will open up whole new avenues to sex production.
There's a whole ocean of sex under this vagina and no one can touch it but me.
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That's when you flip her over
You see then FSM would also have to eliminate Alcohol and Weed not just Sex.
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