And So I Write...

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And so I write...


I stay in. You see?
I work. You see?
In my work I create worlds with words that will build or destroy. 
That will caress your soul with the touch of goddess made with 
roses of roulette. 
That cannot see nor judge. 
Just blindfolds and a scale and the vision of the observer and 
the flame that is awe beckoning back and forth like the flags 
lined up at the Olympics.
Empower or entrench or fill with prejudice or pride or the grin of 
a little kid who just seen his hero hand him an autograph from 
Mars. 
Bewilder or belittle but be certain this is the craft for which I was 
placed here for. You see?
And push forward I will.
I must.
For the world awaits…
When you do see it is an everlasting ever peaceful ever 
ascending gasp of conquering the impossible.
It is, starlight.
It is, stardust.
It is, an escape from the bland and the boring and the bold and 
the petulant wrath of the societal hole. 
For which I wield this sword.
For which I wield this war.
For it is thine destiny to plow through the “has beens” 
or the “have nots” 
or the “wish I dids“
or the “I am not good enoughs”
or the "but they didn’t like its" 
or the “no you cannots”
To torch the bell of sound
and wind of triumphant everlasting “fear nots”
barreling forth with the speed of ten thousand silent explosions. 
emanating from years of holding back the only power you ever 
knew. 
that you used to escape from when words were war. 
and plates were shattered. 
and bills were extinction. 
and divorce was set in stone. 
it is the light that pulls you through. 
through and thrusted and pulverizing the tunnel. 
and rips open your soul like fifty-five billion voices chanting your 
name.
But then you realize. You see?
All you need to do is just inspire one voice.
And so I write…

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Posted Feb 9, 2018, 3:46 AM UTC

25
corgi-queen•

I like the structure. My only nit pick is that the capitalization is a little odd; the “It”s and “For”s are capitalized but not the “and”s. Seems a bit random, but besides that it’s good

2
designdaworldOP•

Thank you for the feedback.

I am very new to formatting on Reddit so I just wanted to get the text out

1
dogtim•

You write with a lot of energy and excitement, that much is clear. What I don't like is that the narrator spends a lot of time trying to convince his readers that writing is happening. All the "you see?" and "I must" and so on. Yep, I see. I'm reading it, aren't I? You could lose about half of the lines here and it wouldn't lose any meaning -- it'd get more concentrated. Get rid of all of the lines explaining what you're doing. Every line should either develop an image or create a new one.

2
designdaworldOP•

What if I told you this was a copy and paste from a lost poem of one of the best writers and poets of the 21st century?

1
dogtim•

I'd say...thanks?

1