Looking for a DURABLE laptop (and ideally cheap, but not necessarily good)

I'm looking for a DURABLE laptop. Does not have to be light. Does not have to be fast.

Priority number 1: durability. It's primary use case will be as a bulletproof vest. Secondary use case will be at robotics competitions, where is may occasionally be dropped from waist height.

Priority number 2: cheap. Ideally around $300-$500. Can go more if worth it.

Priority number 3: IO. Needs Ethernet and a minimum of 2 USB, ideally 4

Thanks for suggestions!!