Preparing for my mom's departure.

Last September, my mom was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer. The original tumor was an adenocarcinoma of the stomach, and it metastasized to her peritoneal cavity.

This came as such a shock to all of us. She was always so healthy throughout my life. She never smoked or drank, ate healthfully, went to the gym three times a week. She was one of those people that you would expect to live forever. Her birthday is tomorrow, and she is turning 60.

She originally was on Xeloda for chemo. The goal was to manage the cancer until my sister's graduation this June. She started a TPN drip at this time, as she was not able to eat as much and was rapidly losing weight.

About four months after starting, the oncologist said the treatment was no longer effective, and then my mom switched a more aggressive brand.

Two weeks ago, she was hospitalized for vomiting blood. She has since been discharged and is receiving hospice care out of home. The doctors came back and said they believe that the TPN may have been helping the cancer grow. After this week, she has decided to discontinue the use of the TPN.

She just talked to me about this yesterday, so it has been at the forefront of my mind all day. I feel like I am in a fog. How have others prepared for the loss of a parent?