In a newer romantic relationship what makes you feel vulnerable?
This one is for discussion.
What moments, words make you feel vulnerable in a newer relationship? How do deal with it?
Posted Apr 3, 2018, 2:14 PM UTC
106
Is "everything" an answer? lol
I usually warn people that I'm slow to warm up, but once I do, it more than makes up for their patience. I'm the kind of person who takes a long time to open up, so someone who pushes fast for intimacy or who doesn't receive me well when I do open up is going to get me off balance. Normally I'll retreat until I have translated everything I'm feeling into words, then I'll discuss with them.
7
You think you have no insecurities until you have to show them to someone you are interested in. And then when you muster the courage to do so, and they see you and accept you the way you are, it creates this very deep sense of connection. If we broke down the experience of falling in love to more discrete components, this would be one of the bigger ones.
7
Agree!! I think people underestimate how powerful it is to feel accepted by your partner, and safe.
2
For me, it's revealing some of my hobbies that are not in the "mainstream", and being ok with that. I enjoy my hobbies for a reason, but it's hard not to be afraid of being judged when they aren't something that a lot of people my age are into. I minimize them and downplay how interested I am because of it, so it's a big deal to me when I feel accepted and loved when I bare that to someone newer.
1
I don't really feel vulnerable in a new relationship, because I'm not attached to the other person yet. If I do or say something and he rejects me, it's no big deal.
I feel vulnerable as I start to get attached to someone and depend on him. Then, what makes me feel vulnerable/unsafe is any criticism or signs of lack of acceptance.
1
Don’t ever get attached - keep arms length distance minimum - and break it off before holidays or birthdays because that just makes memories and nostalgia that when remembered will make the ending far much more painful
1
That doesn't sound like much fun. I think I'll pass.
1
That’s fine, if you think the risks are worth it go right ahead.
1
Letting myself get attached emotionally because deep inside I know this will eventually end in lies and betrayal
1
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It absolutely should be done slowly.
I'm lucky in that I'm with a patient man who values his independence and alone time as much as I do. So I get a lot of time on my own to reflect and digest.
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