28 MTF 2 years HRT 4 months post FFS with Dr. Shih/Kaiser

I definitely male fail (I present as male only hence the masculine clothing), but it seems to come and go. I rarely get gendered male, but it does happen. Most of the time, I feel like people are unsure what I am since they seem to avoid pronouns. I have had some theories though like maybe because they put no effort into gendering me mentally, they don't put as much effort as they used to verbally gender me. Before FFS, people used to say stuff like "Hey ladies" or "Girl", and I don't get that at the same frequency as before, which makes me feel like I look less feminine. Before, when I was in the men's bathroom, a lot of guys were startled. It seemed to be the norm for me. Now, guys generally don't look at me or jump when they go in the bathroom that they they used. It still happens, guys getting startled, but just not as frequent. All of these things make it hard for me to gauge I look male, androgynous, or female, especially since a month or two ago, I was getting gendered male 1-2 a day (I made another transpassing post where I was super sad about it). I think I am mostly read androgynous, which I hate. Usually if I do get clear signs of being read as female, it is usually by women.

People on here ask me about presenting. What's my goal? I really do want to present as female, but I fear losing my friends, family, and job. I prodded around what people thought of transgender people and it was mostly negative. I'll probably do it anyways after SRS (scheduled in late July of this year) since the idea of going into the women's bathroom with a penis kind of makes me uncomfortable. I don't know if I'll ever come out at work since I don't want to use the bathroom with girls I have known for nearly a decade. I'd feel weird about that too. My transition is so complicared, lol.