Scoring top marks on the Alcohol Use Disorder quiz: Then vs Now....

Hiya folks!

A while ago, I was reading about the diagnostic criteria for Alcohol Use Disorder, as listed in the DSM-V (the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders), and realised by the end of my 15-year alcohol addiction, I would have answered a resounding 'Yes' to every single one of the assessment questions, which was a bit of a shocker...

Under the DSM – 5th Edition (the current version of the DSM) guidelines, anyone meeting any two of the 11 criteria during the same 12-month period receives a diagnosis of Alcohol Use Disorder... This is the modern medical term for a range of problematic drinking behaviour, covering both alcohol abuse and alcohol dependence...

The severity of an AUD is graded mild, moderate, or severe:

Mild: The presence of 2 to 3 symptoms

Moderate: The presence of 4 to 5 symptoms

Severe: The presence of 6 or more symptoms

 

Alcohol Use Disorder is a progressive condition which moves through predictable stages, the more and longer you drink...

Those most at risk are individuals with a history of addiction or alcohol/drug abuse in their close family, and particularly those who start drinking at an early age, i.e. before the age of 25, before the brain has fully finished developing...

The stages can be broadly summarised as follows:

Fun > Fun, with Problems > Problems > Death...

Here are the assessment criteria, along with my answers as they would have been just before I stopped drinking in 2017:

 

Have you, in the past year:

 

• Had times when you ended up drinking more or longer than you intended?

Oh yes... Quite often I'd tell myself that I'd 'Just Have One' (glass, bottle, vat, whatever), and only end up stopping when I passed out, or when there was no more Booze to be had, whichever came first... On occasion, I'd get my ration of alcohol in for the night (and I could never keep more than a 24-hour supply in at a time, because I'd end up drinking ALL of it), only to find that it wasn't quite enough, and I'd have to dart back out to the shop for an extra couple of cans before closing time...

 

• More than once wanted to cut down or stop drinking, or tried to, but couldn’t?

Yes... I'd spoken to doctors several times over the years about my drinking in a vague and wishy-washy sort of way, and tried several times to stop or cut down all on my own, but for some reason it never seemed to stick for very long...

 

• Spent a lot of time drinking? Or being sick or getting over the aftereffects?

Hell yes... By the end, acquiring Booze, drinking Booze or recovering from Booze was practically all I did...

 

• Experienced Craving — a strong need, or urge, to drink?

Yes, every day... By the early evening, a curiously powerful sensation of thirst would come upon me, and I would find myself being helplessly propelled towards the nearest source of alcohol, quite forgetting that I'd woken up that morning and sworn 'never again'...

 

• Found that drinking — or being sick from drinking — often interfered with taking care of your home or family? Or caused job troubles? Or school problems?

Yes... I certainly was never performing particularly brilliantly at the various jobs I had... In 2016 I missed my own Grandmother's funeral because I was holed up in my Mountain Hideaway, drinking heavily and not answering the phone or emails at the time, and I didn't find out it was happening until it was already too late to arrange travel...

 

• Continued to drink even though it was causing trouble with your family or friends?

Yup... I was never a violent or mean drunk, but my nearest and dearest had begun to express serious concern about my Alcohol intake and my state of mind... An acquaintance (who was in recovery himself) even quietly slipped me an AA leaflet at one point, while I was clearly suffering from the unmistakable effects of a monumental Hangover... I steadfastly ignored them all, and continued drinking...

 

• Given up or cut back on activities that were important or interesting to you, or gave you pleasure, in order to drink?

Yes... I'd virtually abandoned various former hobbies, as well as given up socialising altogether... The one hobby I did still devote a great deal of time to, strangely enough, was Home Brewing...

 

• More than once gotten into situations while or after drinking that increased your chances of getting hurt (such as driving, swimming, using machinery, walking in a dangerous area, or having unsafe sex)?

Yes indeedy... I thought nothing of operating power tools or doing my own electrical work while slightly squiffy... In my younger days, I couldn't even count the number of times I'd fallen out of clubs completely wasted in the small hours of the morning, and staggered blearily through sketchy parts of town, trying to find my way home... Over the years, I found myself in various other risky and embarrassing situations too numerous to mention, but it never seemed to stop me drinking...

 

• Continued to drink even though it was making you feel depressed or anxious or adding to another health problem? Or after having had a memory blackout?

Yes, absolutely... For years, I had no idea that the increasingly severe recurrent episodes of terrible depression and awful gnawing anxiety I was experiencing could possibly have anything to do with my drinking... I thought the drink was helping!! Not remembering big chunks of the previous evening became a frequent occurrence, but I just shrugged it off and carried on... By the end of my drinking years, I'd also started developing an alarming tic/twitch thing, palpitations, brain fog, terrible digestion, awful liquid shits, poor sleep, and a whole constellation of other disturbing symptoms, all of which, as it turned out, were directly related to my alcohol intake and malnutrition....

 

• Had to drink much more than you once did to get the effect you want? Or found that your usual number of drinks had much less effect than before?

Hmm, that too... I had a remarkably high tolerance right from when I first started drinking at 17, and it only increased over time... By my early 30's, I'd largely given up binge-drinking and hard liquor after far too many regrettable experiences, because of course, I wasn't an 'Alcoholic'... No, I was a 'Drinking Enthusiast'... 'Alcoholics' go to meetings... Instead, I'd developed a taste for strong ciders and IPA's, which purely by coincidence also had the highest ABV of all the beer styles...Two or three litres of strong beer or cider a day was 'enough' for maintenance purposes, up until it wasn't...

 

• Found that when the effects of alcohol were wearing off, you had withdrawal symptoms, such as trouble sleeping, shakiness, irritability, anxiety, depression, restlessness, nausea, or sweating?

Yes, definitely... I'm not sure quite when this happened, but certainly by my late 20's or so, I had begun to notice that I'd start sweating and feeling on edge if I went too long without a drink... Throwing up or dry-heaving in the shower became a regular feature of my morning routine... I'd sometimes find myself having to have a quick pint of beer in the pub at lunchtime to top up the levels, or even a measure of brandy in my morning coffee to get through a hangover on work days.... After I clocked off, I'd have a quick pre-mixed Gin and Tonic or two on the National Express, on the way home to start drinking for the evening... It was gradually starting to dawn on me by this point that I might possibly have had a tiny bit of a drinking problem, but I seemed to still be 'functioning'.... sort of...

 

After another few years of this however, I was no longer really 'functioning' at all, and by early 2017 the 15 years of boozing had really started to catch up with me... I was existing mostly on strong coffee, cigarettes, weed and terrible cheap cider, with just the odd bit of Beige Food late at night to keep me going...

By the end, I was broke, isolated, reclusive, mostly nocturnal, grey-faced, bloated, dead-eyed, mildly insane and terribly, terribly unhappy... My life as an addict had truly become unmanageable...

I looked and felt dreadful, every single day, and I was so sick and tired of feeling sick and tired that I had even begun to contemplate suicide...

Instead, I finished off the last bottle, went to the doctor for some help to detox safely, and found my way here...

Now, after 364 days without a drop, I can cheerfully and honestly answer 'NO' to every single one of those questions!

Here's how I did it...

Among the numerous benefits, I sleep better, I eat sensibly at regular mealtimes, my brain and body are working as they should be; I look and feel considerably better than I did 12 months ago, and I'm looking forward to celebrating my 1-year sober date tomorrow... I'm also cautiously optimistic about the future again for the first time in years....

I don't have an Alcohol Use Disorder any more, but I do know exactly how I could get one again, really quickly!!

Thanks for being here folks, I couldn't have done it without you!

IWNDWYT

Much love,

Woody :>)>

 

^(Edited because I'm STILL shit at formatting!)