Feedback Requested, title suggestions deeply desired

Feedback Received!

Feel free to gut this poem, it's the first thing I've written in years. It also needs a title. (I am bad at titles).

It is a love poem, feel free to call me a nerd who writes love poems.

I see you've heard the rumors  
And lies about my heart  
I guard my heart like a chest of gold  
A thing that gleams like a winter sun  
(A thing with weight and worth and cold)  
Or that I serve as my own jailer  
Holding the keys to the cell I pace  
Locked away to stop me breaking hearts or  
To shut the neighbors up about  
my howling at the moon  

Or did they whisper to you,  
(Lips to ear in a gossips kiss)  
of an empty place inside my chest  
from the absent hearted woman  
gone and roving with a bloody fist?  

But if you're so determined  
To play the loving thief  
To crack my ribs with sweetness;  
slit my pericardium with a kiss  
Then you should know (like all thieves should)  
Just what you seek to steal  
There's nothing gold (or bloody red),  
It's missing iron bars  

Inside my heart there is a knife  
Slightly battered, but still sharp  
Which you must take  
and turn and thrust  
And hold me in your heart  

(I am a good boy plz no delet)

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Posted Jul 27, 2018, 3:07 AM UTC

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