Thanks! Poems are always, at least to me, living documents.  I'll see what I can do about lightening up parts of it.

I like this a lot. It's meter and format is very artistic. It makes it feel very simple, but your words and the emotions they evoke are quite complex. Your first stanza is beautiful. Your poems reads like high staccato notes played by a piano. Light, airy, bouncy and sweet. 

The main phrase, summers sentiment seems to contrast the lightness since it's so syllable heavy. I think a different phrase would be more impactful but I'm sure you chose those words for a reason. 

Summer's Sentiment

:

If love

Weighs upon you

Travel light

:

For you and I

Are too complicit

In Summer's sentiment

:

As lovers

Spread their hearts

It’s all or nothing

:

And so I leave

For something real

To find me too

:

All I know is

I came and went

And that doesn't hurt

:

And my regrets

Up and left

So I'll behave

:

So it is

In Summer's sentiment

For me

:

And for love

As is

True



:::



https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/98ftti/a_cure_for_the_brain/e4h5b36?utm_source=reddit-android


https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/981jmj/envy/e4h673q?utm_source=reddit-android

