Autumn Leaves

Today is the last day of my life.

Finally! I can do nothing without shame.

Good dammed drug addicts (that's the animals, yes YOU too! ) ! indeed!

They just be running around escaping the pain-chemicals in their brains and chasing the happy-dragons of same kind. And the thought of ending this cycle of shit-chasing brings even greater shit chemicals. A cruel fucking game indeed.

Mm the dragons in my brain... Thank God for heroin. Drug of gods they say. Thank Zeus and Hades for that lovely gift...

(Fucking greeks... We are the second eternal cumming of Sisyphus. [Camus, shit your pants from your pitiful grave!] )

.. Brings you the dragons without dealing with shit like life food, family, love, friends, and all those fairy tales.
Ah what the hell! Just skip directly to death so you don't have to deal with the hell in the moments between hits.

God damn sad hippies and "well adjusted" peeople and former junkies and current junkies, pissing your pants. You hate me, but I'm telling the truth, and you know it. You know it! Misery is life. Life is misery.

Oh you Buddhists and moderates you say: the middle way! Balance!
Yep, and the people that said: "go all in (on life) " - and did it- they're all dead. Released. Escaped the Jaws of shit-sistance. Theres your Nirvana, Heaven, End of life, Death, Expiry date, Retirement...

Oh! The final release. Final fucking rest. Mmmmmm. Can't fucking wait... Alas! My only action are my words; this shit situation only let's me expunge shit in this shit form: There's no "free will" to be found...

... Miserable determinist nihilists. The worst sort of people. Hideous monstrous truth sayers. Only wallows, rubs them self and others faces in the enveloping shit.

(.. Maybe they just want to share their shitty brainstates to other beings. What a noble mission indeed.)

Trolls bullies child rapists serial killers baby eaters. The noblest of kinds...

Nobel price! Nobel price!

Hail misery. Hail Mary. Hail Hitler. Hail Ceasar. Hail Zeus. Hail Hailey. Hail death.

Call me your worst. Flay me at the stake and the cross, burn me and torture me slowly. Rape my family. Crush kitten heads. Eat puppies alive. Burn it all. Burn burn burn burn burn burn burn. Thanks to autocorrect, burn all. Hail fire and death. Hail eternal darkness. Hail state of maximum entropy.

Fuck you.

---

THRASH me you fucking sweet summer princess!

The Butterfly Devourer
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/9ah6ev/comment/e4vi6zu

Stoical Depression
https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/comments/9acy2f/comment/e4vnb7b

Autumn Leaves