alright fuck it who's the best orientalist

i know people like those old french painters but i've spent so much time arguing the price of cigarettes with arabs and none of it really captured the feeling of sitting around in a garden playing checkers while some chubby white girl lays around with her tits out

i think i'm gonna have to give the nod to ridley scott. the man's use of sound, slow mo, close ups, lighting, dark skinned foreigners staring motionlessly at you while scary music plays, that guy really captures the feeling of accidentally wandering into a hookah lounge where nobody speaks english. i know spielberg and lucas are masters of the fat sweaty guy with a curly moustache standing behind a counter who says "my friend" over and over while noisily eating from a bowl of monkey eyeballs but the music just isn't there. where's the woman with the sunglasses singing about noisily eating monkey eyeballs? where's the slow mo shots of people with big eyebrows staring? it's just not the same.