I shouldn’t feel bad about being extra hungry and eating a lot today

I’m underweight.. like 20- 24 lbs underweight depending on the weight criteria for my height I’m looking at. But nothing is every good enough. I’ve been starving today... I ate 1100 calories before dinner & wine & w/e other bullshit I would want to eat at night. I try to aim for 350 during the day, then wine, low calorie dinner & dessert at

I want to eat more. I shouldn’t care. I’m skinny... I’m underweight. Even if I gain a pound who gives a shit?! ME! I give a shit. And I hate myself for that

ETA: I deleted all my MFP entries. Even if my Weight is going to be up tomorrow I don’t want to be disappointed at how much I ate today. My body & mind wanted it and I’ll have to be content w that