Do any of you feel like you’re the only enjoyment in your parent’s otherwise depressing life?

I’m 21 and spend very little time out of the year with my mom. Christmas break is primarily the main time that I’m with her for more than a day or two - this year I’m with her for almost three weeks.

Today is the first day of me staying with her and it’s left me in tears. For as long as I’ve known her, she’s kept everyone in her life, outside of what little family we have that she’s willing to keep in touch with, at a distance. Her coworkers, she doesn’t talk to them outside the office as she looks down on them and simply doesn’t seem to care. The same goes for her neighbors. I’ve come to realize over the past years after starting my own life that she depends on me and me alone entirely for support and connection.

I respect my mother. She brought me into this world and raised me enough to grow into my own person. But the life that she leads is the opposite of what I wish to have in the future and who I want to be 30 years from now. Her life is depressing and dull without me in it and it terrifies me knowing that. I hate that the reason I am spending time with her now is because she has pushed everyone else away. This time with her feels more like a job or requirement than an act of love.

Am I alone in having a parent like this?