Before and After: life is so much better sober!
Left: 3 years into a heavy, daily drinking problem. I hit rock bottom 2 years later.
Right: 3 months sober
I won’t get into my whole story right now unless someone really wants to hear it, but I just want to tell anyone who is listening... IT DOES GET BETTER.
I didn’t think I could stop, I thought I would die drunk and the really sad part is, that’s what I really wanted. I was so miserable and just tired of life. After a few key events, I finally woke up one day and realized that I didn’t want to die, but I couldn’t live like this anymore and I went to rehab.
I spent 3 months in rehab, and I went back home 2 months ago. I should have 5 months sober this month but I relapsed last month. And you know what? THATS OKAY.
By relapsing, I remembered why drinking isn’t for me. I woke up that morning sick, tired, dizzy and ashamed. That doesn’t undo all of the work I did in my recovery, it reinforced it. In recovery, I learned that life is so much better sober. I’m not running away from my problems anymore, I’m tackling them and I have the strength and energy to do that now because I’m not constantly fucked up or sick. I don’t go through my days just going through the motions anymore, trying to navigate through the brain fog. I wake up and do everything with purpose now.
I’m not saying it’s easy, it’s NOT. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. The damage I did to my friendships, relationships, mental health, physical health, and financial wellness was extensive, and it’s going to take time to repair. That’s not even mentioning the legal trouble I got myself into. But being sober is allowing me to work on those things, and continuing drink would only make things worse and never better. Also, I’ve lost 22 pounds since July and literally the only change I made was cutting out the booze.
You guys can do this! Have faith in yourselves! Get a sponsor or reach out to a community like this when you feel like you need a drink. If no one has told you that they love you today, I love you. And I believe in you.
One day at a time <3
Posted Dec 16, 2018, 11:07 PM UTC