Existential crisis on replay

I cannot figure out how to get out of this constant existential crisis cycle that I am in. Exercise helps, therapy helps, spending time with friends and family helps, but every night is the same. Or anytime I'm alone. I recognize that all of the options are wide open to me now, life is a wonderland, but it's terrifying at the same time. I'm terrified to die but I don't know how to live. (not suicidal, just existentially confused) How do you cope? How do you find purpose and break the monotony? I'm trying to enjoy the small things but without the "promise" of a next life, I feel panicked to live life to the fullest NOW but the freedom paralyzes me. It was easier when I had a prescribed life, though it was miserable and I guess the lack of purpose was the same. At least then I knew what was expected of me. Now that it's up to me, I don't even know what I want my life to look like post Mormonism. It's exciting and scary at the same time.