Sex is not interesting or exciting to me. Help

When I am away from my husband, one of two things happens. A; I am absolutely fine. Sex doesn't cross my mind in any form or fashion, whatsoever. I live a completely sexless life and I am 100% okay with it. No desires or wants or anything. We can be apart for months, and I am completely fine. B; I *do* get urges. I have thoughts and fantasies and dreams. I *crave* sex.

But as soon as I'm back with my husband, or when I'm with him as usual, it goes away. I have no desires. I don't want to have sex. I'm happy living my life without it. I don't need it, I barely think about it. In fact, the only time it really crosses my mind is when I'm thinking of how horrible of a wife I am because I don't want to have sex.

It's not sex with him or *the* sex. It's just I don't find any interest in sex in general. I don't care for it. Everyone on TV, movies, etc. (horrible example I know) is excited to have sex and they hate being pulled away and they think about it and they have fun. I don't experience any of that. I enjoy myself, I guess, it feels good, I get turned on, I almost always reach orgasm, but other than the actual moments during sex, I just don't care. I don't even like making out. I just...it doesn't interest me, none of it. I didn't even feel the desire to have sex until I started dating my husband and I think, even then, it was a "societal" pressure. It was more of a, sex is normal so you have to do it at some point, sort of thing.

When he starts trying to have sex, I have to control the urge to roll my eyes and groan. It's not him, I just don't care for sex, or making out, or any of it. I don't want to have sex. I want to continue doing whatever it was I was doing before. I have to flip a switch so that I can get in the right mindset. I don't feel pressured, my husband is very understanding, but it's like...going to a work party. You don't really *want* to go, but you really *should* go, and it's not at all terrible while you're there, you even kind of have a good time, and at the end of it, you didn't regret it. But you also wouldn't have regretted staying at home and vegging on the couch.

Please send help.