Stick a fork in Asia and this case...

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"The truth and a trial have as much to do with each other as a hot dog and a warm puppy."-James Sinclair, "Trials and Tribulations" NYPD Blue (S2E1)

I forgot this truism while obsessing over this case. I admonished those who allowed hindsight to color their perspective while being clueless how I was guilty of the same thing. The following covers all outstanding questions about Asia's alibi that puzzled me and brings resolution to this case (except for those engaged in the deliberate deception spinning the fiction that CG was incompetent). Others may have already reached the conclusions described below and if you have, kudos. Many already know or at least suspect that Asia's letters are BS. This time we're gonna take the explanation to the final frontier (the truth....not space).

• Jay's testimony is full of lies: No big surprise here, but we need to start here to understand the Asia alibi.
• How Adnan and his family managed to subvert the Grand Jury system and why: This is key and has been the missing piece of the puzzle. Also key is understanding how the Grand Jury system works.
• Both of Asia's letters were written at least one month after their dates: Many already believe this, but we will dive a little deeper so we understand why Adnan used her in particular and why the letters were backdated.
• Why Adnan "waited" so long to show CG the Asia letters.
• How CG saved several of Adnan's friends and family from going to jail: Also covers why CG could not stand Adnan and his family.

Before you read on, please know that I do not expect you to take my word as gospel. I encourage you to check every fact on which this post is based for yourself. For reasons beyond my understanding, Redditor u/justwonderinif hates my guts, but dammit if he or she didn't do a masterful job of compiling the most comprehensive set of timelines I've ever seen on this subject. I understand that the gathering of this information was a group effort that included the time and financial resources of other redditors some of whom no longer participate in this sub. My hats off to you all. These timelines are a nice quick reference with links to the source documents that I implore you to read before telling me that I'm full of shit. And if there is something glaring that I missed, I'm more than willing to accept that I'm full of shit. I just ask that you please point it out.

Jay Lied (Big Surprise, but this is important)

I made a rookie mistake in my earlier posts and assumed that Jay's (and the state’s) story was the truth. Because Adnan and Jay were both involved in HML's murder and burial (see earlier post that establishes...), I incorrectly assumed that Adnan knew the timeline that Jay would give the police. I naively bought Jay's story that he was driving around in Adnan's car and using his phone the day HML happened to disappear so he could buy a birthday present for his girlfriend. Jay gave the prosecution as much of a story as they needed to nail Adnan. Jay's story obviously downplays the role he played in HML's murder. I must emphasize that Jay's story could have been ANYTHING. If Adnan tried to cover himself for what he knew was the time HML was actually killed without knowing the State's theory that was based on Jay's bullshit version, HE WOULD HAVE SCREWED HIMSELF BECAUSE HE DIDN'T KNOW IF JAY'S STORY WOULD COINCIDE WITH THE TRUTH. Adnan had no idea what story Jay would be spinning to the cops. Thus, Adnan's claim that Jan 13 was a haze. The wide range that HML was murdered "on or about Jan 13 to Jan 31" listed on Adnan's arrest warrant would also have likely given him pause. He didn't want to commit to anything immediately in the days surrounding his arrest because he didn't know what Jay told the cops.

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Grand Jury

So, as of March 1, 1999 Adnan had no clue what Jay would say. He and his stupid family and friends then embarked on a moronic plan to figure out what that story is. That story came out during the grand jury investigation that began on or about February 16, 1999 and ended April 14, 1999 when Adnan was formally indicted. Yeah, the grand jury investigation into whether to indict Adnan began almost two weeks before his arrest. Because of the confidentiality requirements for grand juries (more on that below) Adnan didn't even know that there was a group of citizen jurors looking into whether he murdered HML. Note that this wasn’t even Jay’s story. He didn’t testify before the Gran Jury. Although parts of the story were based on Jay’s account, the story was also based on the wider police investigation. Thus, there is yet another degree of separation between what Adnan thought Jay would say and what the state’s story would be be.

Grand juries are ex parte proceedings--for non-lawyers and non-latin speakers that means that only one side, the prosecution, presents the case. There is no counterargument by the defense. In fact, neither the defendant nor his attorney are even in the room during the investigation and witness testimony. It's actually pretty unfair to criminal defendants. SECRECY is key to grand juries. When one witness is testifying, no other witnesses are present. The proceedings are closed to the public. In Maryland, it is illegal for grand jurors and witnesses to disclose information about the proceedings to the public/media. In short, what happens in a grand jury room, stays in a grand jury room.

Part of what the grand jury does is determine the time and circumstances of the crime. There is no publicly available transcript of the grand jury proceedings, but we know that in Adnan's case, among the grand jury witnesses who provided the most days of testimony were Bilal Ahmad (5 days), the youth director at Adnan's mosque and Saad Chaudry (4 days), Adnan's best friend.

A word about Bilal: Adnan's cell phone--you know, the first one he ever owned--the one he got the day before HML was killed...the one he gave to Jay to use the day after he got it? Neither Adnan nor his parents purchased it for him. Bilal got it for Adnan. Adnan's first call after he got arrested...his parents? No, Bilal. When Adnan was done talking to the cops on Feb. 28, did he ask for a lawyer? No, he asked for Bilal. Who do you think hired Adnan's attorneys and coordinated the defense? His parents? No, Bilal. What non-family member or non-attorney visited Adnan in prison more than anyone else? You see the trend here?

Now this next part is not in any way intended to suggest anything other than the fact that operating within the confines of the law and normal behavior are not high priorities for Bilal. In October 1999, Bilal's wife grew suspicious of his nocturnal activities and hired a PI to follow him. In what turned out to likely be that PI's shortest and easiest assignment, almost immediately after the PI started tailing him, Bilal picked up a 14-year-old kid in his family's minivan and parked. The PI called the cops who raided the van and found Bilal and the kid inside with their pants down. Bilal was arrested and the cops found a photo of Adnan in his wallet. No conviction for Bilal though because under the brilliant law at the time, it was not a crime for an adult to engage in sexual contact with a 14-year-old if it was consensual. This predator was the fucking youth director for a religious organization where he preyed upon god knows how many young boys. Anyway, Bilal continued his studies to become a dentist where he gained expertise in administering anesthetics and in the least surprising (given his history) yet somehow still shocking (given the act) turn of events, used said anesthetics on several of his patients some of whom prematurely woke earlier than he intended to find Bilal's dick in their mouth (check the story, I'm not exaggerating). He's currently serving a 16.5 year sentence. Bottom line: Bilal would do anything for Adnan and cares nothing about obeying the laws of society.

Saad Chaudry is Adnan's best friend and brother of Rabia. He has repeatedly gone to bat for Adnan on the podcast and in the case in general and is willing to do anything to exonerate his buddy.

Adnan's Parents--particularly his mom, Shamim: Adnan's attorney's notes from March 1999 indicate that Adnan had a history of forging doctor's notes with Shamim's knowledge. The attorney also included a note to self to admonish Adnan's parents from disclosing privileged information. Shamim also ineptly embraced Asia's BS contradictory narrative (starting @ p.93)) where they allegedly discussed Adnan's timeline and unaccounted time on March 1, 1999, but Shamim supposedly kept this information to herself because she likes the idea of her son rotting in prison. Shamim and her husband also wrote a letter to CG in March of 2000 begging her to use Asia's BS "undiscovered" testimony despite it having been allegedly "discovered" by Adnan's family over a year earlier (yes, I'm being facetious). Bottom line on Shamim: like many moms, she would do anything to get her kid out of jail and based on my personal experience being of the southeast asian community, like many uneducated, southeast asian moms, she has a poor understanding of the law and couldn't give two shits about obeying it if it meant getting her kid out of jail.

So, Adnan's champions, Bilal and Saad, collectively provided grand jury testimony for 9 days--way more than any other witnesses. Notably, the prosecution DID NOT use Jay as a witness for the grand jury. Basically, Jay was not a reliable witness because he could not keep his story straight because his testimony would not have been based on the easiest thing for him to remember (the truth). So for those who are convinced that the cops and prosecution relied 100% on Jay's timeline and story from the time Adnan was arrested...sorry. The prosecution did, however, present their theory and timeline to the grand jury against which Saad and Bilal were likely questioned (i.e. "Do you know what time he was at the mosque on Jan 13?", etc.). The 2:15 PM time is a no-brainer related to when school was dismissed, but where did 8 PM come from? It came from Bilal during his Grand Jury testimony. This 8 PM time did not exist before Bilal's testimony. It was invented during Bilal’s late March testimony—WAY AFTER March 1. Recall that Bilal wasn’t even subpoenaed by the Grand Jury until March 16. We know that it's crap that Adnan was at the masjid at 8 PM because his phone was calling Jen's pager at 8:05 PM and pinging the Leakin Park tower. Even if Adnan B-lined it to the masjid after dropping Jay off to be picked up by Jen, the earliest he would have reached would be 8:30 PM. Kristi testified that while at her house Adnan wondered aloud how to get rid of a high. This suggests that Adnan likely smelled of weed. Regardless of whether or not Adnan looked like he had just buried a body, he would likely have gone home to change out of his weed-smelling clothes before going to the masjid to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with his fellow congregants during the Ramadan Taraweeh prayers. When you're standing in the prayer line, it's obvious if the guy next to you is a cigarette smoker, uses too much cologne, or has BO issues. Reeking like a giant doob is something that would not have gone unnoticed. Anyway, this would put Adnan's arrival to the masjid closer to 9 PM at the earliest. But Asia's March 1st letter clearly provides the time frame of 2:15 - 8 PM--it’s worth repeating again: this 8 PM time was not invented until Bilal's subsequent injected himself into the case. Even Rabia laments how Bilal could have provided Adnan with an alibi for when he was allegedly burying Hae's body with Jay at Leakin Park. Thus, the invented 8 PM time by the guy who bought Adnan his secret cell phone, was Adnan's first call after being arrested, arranged for Adnan's defense, coordinated the local Muslim community's fundraising to pay for said defense, visited Adnan in prison more than any non-relative/non-attorney and had a photo of Adnan in his wallet when he was picked up for sexual contact with a minor. Is it possible that this guy could have made up the 8 PM time to help the object of his obsession and leaked it causing it to later appear in Asia's letter dated March 1st? Of course, at trial Bilal never ended up testifying and the 8 PM issue was never directly raised (indirectly raised by Adnan's fathers perjurious testimony) for at least the following reasons: 1) seeing Adnan at 8 PM at the masjid was a demonstrable lie, 2) in a community of over 1000 families, not one person (other than Adnan's dad and Bilal) would testify to seeing Adnan on one of the last 10 nights of Ramadan when EVERYONE goes to the masjid, and 3) Bilal's concern over having his bs alibi testimony impeached by his credibility being attacked for his October 1999 arrest where he was literally caught with his pants down with a minor, which would keep him off the stand.

The days immediately following the grand jury testimony of Bilal and Saad show coinciding visits to Adnan in jail by his parents. A Maryland Public Information Act (MPIA) request resulted in the production of Bilal's cell records from December 1998 to April 1999 (thanks to u/justwonderinif for providing this record upon request). The cops sought Bilal's cell records in mid-April because--as I've repeated several times--they were not ready to believe Jay's story and thought Bilal, who bought and paid for the service for the phone that Adnan activated a day before HML disappeared, might also be involved. Anyway, over this four month period, there are 34 calls between Bilal and Saad (410-869-9498). ALL BUT ONE OF THESE CALLS TOOK PLACE DURING THE TIME OF THE GRAND JURY.

Reflect on this for a minute. All but one of the calls between Saad and Bilal over a four month stretch took place between March 5 and April 8. The single outlier call took place on December 20, 1998.This is the date that Adnan broke up with HML and Adnan called Bilal that day. Bilal called Saad immediately after probably out of concern for Adnan. All other calls between Bilal and Saad were related to the grand jury investigation. It is also worth noting that Bilal's records show that between March 5, 1999 to the time the records were cut off on April 16, 1999 (two days after the grand jury indicted Adnan), there are 85 calls between Bilal and Adnan's parents. During this five week period, Adnan's parents only visited him after days of significant grand jury testimony by Bilal and/or Saad. Please check the call log, visitor log and grand jury testimony days yourself and see if I'm cherry picking. You can't make this shit up. Bilal and Saad were calling each other to compare notes of what they were beig asked and discussing their respective grand jury testimony. The whole while, Bilal was in constant contact with Adnan's parents providing them with the information needed to concoct an alibi. In fact, Adnan's attorney, Chris Flohr, felt compelled to warn Shamim about seeing Bilal on April 8. Adnan's parents would then leak the summary of the state's case including the relevant timeline theory to Adnan during their visits to him in jail. This is crazy illegal. I was trying to develop a pun using Leakin Park, but this is not the time for my literary bullshit. Bottom line: the content of the grand jury's findings somehow found its way into Asia's letters and these two ass-clowns, Bilal and Saad, were the closest ones to it and called each other 33 times over a five week period during the grand jury investigation.

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The Asia Letters

Adnan was now in possession of the secret timeline that was determined by the grand jury against which he needed to concoct an alibi. But he and his conspirators knew that they had to protect themselves from their scheme being uncovered. They needed a witness who was not part of the grand jury investigation. A witness who the cops had not interviewed. A witness who was not part of Adnan's inner circle against whom others are less likely to provide contradictory testimony. They also knew they had to avoid the perception that Adnan's champions had illegally leaked the substance of the grand jury testimony. Enter Asia. An ex of Adnan's close friend who fit the bill of being distant enough to avoid being part of the investigation, close enough to be convinced to play ball and stupid enough to go along with it. Moreover, Adnan's crew were likely concerned that the State might dismiss Asia's testimony as having been invented in hindsight after the State disclosed HML's time of death (yes, hindsight plays multiple roles in this case). Then they had their brilliant epiphany: If Adnan received a letter from Asia dated BEFORE the grand jury proceedings, it would kill two birds with one stone because people would be less likely to claim that the info contained therein could be based on anything leaked through Bilal and Saad from the grand jury and there is no way anyone could accuse Asia of making up the alibi after the fact. That left them with a relatively small window of time for when the letters were written: Between the date Adnan was arrested on February 28 and March 5 when the cops reached out to Saad. "Let's date the letter for March 1, 1999. No one will be able to question whether it's legit if it's dated that early!" So these boneheads thought they came up with the perfect solution to insulate themselves from accusations of leaking grand jury info and bolstering the credibility of Asia's alibi. Leaving aside the issues with the Nostradamus-like statements that Asia makes in the letters, the logical problems of Adnan receiving the letters right after being arrested and then sitting on them for months without telling anyone about them never occurred to these geniuses.

On 4/20, about one week after the grand jury indicted Adnan, the cops interviewed Adnan's friend Ja'uan. Ja'uan told the cops that Adnan had been writing him letters. He also said that Adnan wrote a letter to a 12th grader named ASIA with instructions to write him a typed letter for which he provided the address. Ja'uan said that Asia screwed up the address on the first letter. Keep in mind that on March 6, 1999, according to his lawyer's notes, Adnan asked what the address was for the jail and how mail to inmates is scrutinized. Looking at the cops' notes and the fact that the substance of Asia's letters was unknown (and likely unwritten) at the time, the cops did not feel compelled to question Asia after having already questioned nearly half of Adnan's classmates.

The following is the explanation of the odd move of Asia allegedly sending letters to Adnan dated on consecutive days. Asia's first letter dated March 1, 1999 was likely the one with the wrong address and had the line about Adnan's unwitnessed, unaccountable time between 2:15 PM and 8 PM on Jan 13. That letter probably took longer to deliver because of the incorrect address, but eventually found its way to Adnan. Before he received the first letter, Adnan grew impatient and uncertain of whether it would ever arrive and per Ja'uan's statement, asked Asia to send him the second, typed letter that she dated March 2, 1999. This was a hedge in case the first one eventually found its way to Adnan (wouldn't look good if she wrote two letters dated the same day). This second letter had Adnan's prisoner number and, as instructed, address emblazoned across the top. Recall that Adnan asked his lawyer on March 6, 1999 what the address was for people to send letters to him in jail. Believing Asia's March 2 letter is legit requires that she knew Adnan's jail address four days before he did. I also invite anyone to find any reference in the case (police records, prosecution's or defense's evidence, ANYTHING) to Adnan's prisoner number that predates Asia's March 2 letter. Also, Asia was barely an acquaintance. How many letters did Adnan receive from his closest friends between March 1 and March 2? The friends who, unlike Asia, wrote 600 letters of support for Adnan's bail hearing? Surely, these dedicated friends would reach out at least as early as Asia who doesn't even know how to spell "Adnon's" fucking name. All this could easily be debunked if Adnan produced envelopes for Asia's letters that are postmarked March 1 and March 2, but I guarantee that no such envelopes exist.

For those paying attention, the 8:00 pm detail was the dumbest thing to include for so many reasons. First, it was not necessary because Asia only supposedly saw Adnan after school. Second, it’s not true based on the 8:05 pm call to Jen’s pager and Adnan’s cell pinging the Leakin Park tower. Third, it proves Adnan’s crew’s idiotic plan to subvert the grand jury because the source of the 8 pm reference was Bilal’s testimony. Fourth, it proves that Asia’s letter was backdated because Bilal’s perjury to the Grand Jury that he saw Adnan the evening of Jan 13 took place in late March, 3-4 weeks AFTER the bs dates on Asia’s letters. The defense never used the 8 pm time at trial because it fell apart for reason #2 and in a community of 1000 families, no one but Bilal (and Adnan's dad) was willing to lie that they saw Adnan at the mosque on one of the last 10 nights of Ramadan when EVERYONE goes. Adnan had Asia include this extraneous detail thinking it would be helpful to bookend his time because Bilal could falsely vouch for him being at the mosque when Adnan was actually with Jay. Yes, all that can be determined by the moronic choice to provide a range of “unwitnessed, unaccountable time” that ends at 8 pm.

Here's the crazy part: SK unwittingly provided a roadmap for why Adnan reached out to Asia and how he likely fucked it up (based on Ja'uan's description). From the Rumors episode: "No good can come, and in fact only harm can come, from Adnan attempting to contact or influence people on the outside who are connected to his case. That’s kind of inmate behavior 101. Because let’s say Cathy changed her story, suddenly remembered something exculpatory for Adnan. Then the state found out that Adnan had been writing to Cathy, or threatening Cathy somehow, or talking smack about Cathy on a podcast. Then that could be used by the State to challenge the validity of Cathy’s new information." SK was under the impression that Asia’s letters were genuine and written on the dates indicated. She did not know about Ja’uan’s statement to the cops about how Adnan wrote to Asia in April and violated what SK called “Inmate Behavior 101.”

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The Waiting Game

So Adnan's request for Asia's alibi letters went out in mid to late April and he likely received them some time in May. CG started participating in Adnan’s defense in mid April soon after he was formally indicted by the grand jury. Adnan had to sit on the letters for a couple of months because CG was pestering the prosecution about disclosing the elusive timeline that Adnan and his conspirators had illegally obtained. How would it look if he started waving around the alibi letters before his attorney received an answer from the State regarding the time for which he needed an alibi? Finally, on July 8, 1999, in response to a letter from CG where she demanded that the State provide the time of HML's death so she could determine whether her client has an alibi, the State disclosed its theory of when HML was murdered soon after school on Jan 13, 1999. Recall, on March 1, 1999, Adnan had no idea what Jay's story to the prosecution would be. The day Adnan had been waiting for when he could reveal the Asia letters finally arrived.

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The Critical Date

July 10, 1999 is significant in this case both for what happened on this date and for what followed. This is the date CG visited Adnan in jail to discuss whether he could account for himself against the State's timeline. Adnan triumphantly produced his ace in the hole to CG...his Asia letters. CG took one look at the letters and asked, "Why the fuck are these letters dated March 1 and 2???" "Why the fuck didn't you tell me about this person???" "How the fuck does she know your address and prisoner number within two days of your getting arrested?" "How the fuck does she know what your unwitnessed and unaccountable time was A MONTH AND A HALF BEFORE THE GRAND JURY REACHED THAT CONCLUSION???" “HOW THE FUCK IS ASIA’S RANGE OF YOUR UNWITNESSED AND UNACCOUNTABLE TIME THE SAME AS WHAT THE GRAND JURY DETERMINED???”

It took CG about half a second to figure out what Adnan and his friends and family did. She suspected as much when she told Chris Flohr to warn Shamim about seeing Bilal on April 8. She told Adnan, "Do you really want to add grand jury tampering to your list of charges? Your friends and idiot parents can go to jail for this. An army of character witnesses would not be able to undo the jury's perception of your being a duplicitous piece of shit if this comes out. You put me at risk by making me a party to this scheme. Don't you ever fucking bring this up to me again." CG sent her underlings to meet with Adnan likely to see if he'd try to sell them the same BS (which he did) and get their take. CG then went to Adnan's idiot parents and told them, "I have a hard enough job defending your son against the murder charge. I'm trying to show that he's a person of high character and incapable of committing such a crime. You morons are showing he's the opposite by proving that he is capable of undermining the grand jury investigation. If this comes out, it's GAME OVER!" At this point, CG was likely met with blank stares and recognized that Adnan's parents lacked the sophistication to even understand that what they were doing was wrong. By shooting their mouths off during their visits to Adnan, they were putting CG, Adnan, themselves, Bilal and Saad at risk. They were not getting this so she made it simple: "If you meet with him again before the trial date, I will withdraw as counsel and turn you in to the judge. Adnan will definitely lose and you will also go to jail." The prisoner log confirms that neither Adnan's mom nor dad visited him after this date at least through Oct 1999 (date log was compiled). After collectively seeing Adnan 15 times before July 10, 1999, his parents abruptly stopped visiting their son. What parent would not visit their teen-age son in jail? Parents who are co-conspirators in leaking grand jury testimony, that's who. CG herself, disgusted by Adnan's pathetic attempt to subvert the grand jury system, did not visit him again until more than two months later. If you have a better explanation for why Adnan's parents stopped visiting him in prison, lay it on me.

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Gutierrez

I previously posted how CG's legal strategy was sound and that she was being unfairly dragged through the mud by Adnan's supporters. Having pieced together the Asia puzzle, I cannot get my head around the hubris of these pieces of shit. Not only did CG do a sound job at defending this murderer, SHE KEPT THESE CRIMINALLY MORONIC ASSHOLES FROM PUTTING THEMSELVES IN JAIL--with the exception of Bilal, of course. And now they have the nerve to accuse their savior--this angel--of being ineffective??? In view of this, is it any wonder that CG had zero patience for these idiot parents as they sat there with Rabia asking about the legal strategy? I'll give Rabia the benefit of the doubt and assume she was not in on the grand jury scheme. This would explain her confusion and perception that CG was being an unreasonable bitch to Adnan's parents who deserved a lot worse. Rabia was pissed that CG wouldn't share her legal strategy with Adnan's parents. The nerve of these fuckers who she just saved to think they could be trusted with privileged information. CG had a hard enough case to defend without these shit-heads making matters worse. What is particularly insidious is the way these unrepentant pieces of shit are posthumously using CG's illness and disbarment to their advantage and ascribing the problems she encountered in her practice in 2001 to her performance in Adnan's case two years earlier. It should come as no surprise though given how comfortable they were with backdating Asia's letters--why not backdate CG's illness and disbarment as well? These charlatans might as well take it a step further and ascribe her death in 2004 to her representation of Adnan. "She did a shitty job representing Adnan because she was already dead!”

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Conclusion

So that's why the Asia letters were invented after the fact and why the morons had them backdated. This should answer just about any other inconsistencies or questions related to the Asia alibi, including, but not limited to: Adnan blanking on what happened on Jan 13. The timing of Saad and Bilal's testimony coinciding with the parents' visits. The police interview of Ja'uan and what he told them about Adnan writing instructions to Asia one week after the grand jury formally indicted Adnan. Adnan's first attorney's notes about warning Adnan's parents about sharing privileged info. Adnan’s attorney’s notes reminding him to warn Shamim about seeing Bilal on the last day of Saad’s grand jury testimony. CG's disposition toward the parents and refusal to share privileged info with them. The abrupt cessation of the parents' visits after CG's July 10 meeting with Adnan. Bilal's weird obsession with helping Adnan, his prolific grand jury testimony and his loose grip on the distinction between right and wrong. The five months of Bilal’s phone records showing that all but one of the 34 calls between him and Saad took place during the five week stretch where they both testified at the grand jury. Asia not being called as a witness. Adnan’s family’s inconsistent statements regarding knowing about Asia. The reason the letters were backdated. The reason Adnan did not raise them to anyone before July. The reason Adnan said nothing about them after July until after he was convicted and had nothing to lose. The reason Rabia got the letters from Adnan and not CG. The reason CG refused to touch Asia with a 10 foot pole. The reason Adnan and his idiot family of ingrates dumped CG as his counsel after the trial in 2000. Etc, etc. Before you question the validity of this analysis, go back and read those stupid Asia letters in the full context of the evidence of what was known at the time. Go ahead and call it a conspiracy theory. I already said it's full of conspirators, but this is how it happened. Unfortunately, hindsight and decades have colored the way most see this case where the default mode of thinking is that on March 1, 1999, everyone somehow knew what was established almost one year later at trial: that Adnan had to account for himself on January 13, 1999 between 2:15 pm and 8 PM. For those who buy the Asia alibi, the hotdog has become the warm puppy.

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Final Credits

Rabia: I spent a lot of time hating on you for your selective disclosure of information and basically being Adnan's personal FoxNews Network, but a small part of me has to admire you for stage managing this shit show for the past two decades and successfully fooling so many for so long. Harvey Weinstein should hire you to do his PR. If you were fooled by Adnan and his family's bullshit, I feel sorry for you. Being this close to the case had to be difficult and I understand how it can affect your judgment, but that does not absolve you for your posthumous treatment of CG. The way you disparaged CG is unforgivable especially in view of how she risked her career to protect Adnan, his family and your brother. Your practice of disseminating information in dribs and drabs and hiding the skeletons is a great way to string people along, but don't mistake it for practicing law. I initially saw you as an ally whom I was willing to assist with reversing a great injustice, but your withholding key information and engaging in smear campaigns exposed you as the worst kind of obstreperous counsel. As a Muslim, I take issue with how you capitalized on our community's post 9/11 fears, unjust treatment and persecution to trick us into rallying behind and providing our unconditional support for the individual who least deserved it. Congratulations, you gave the Muslim community it's own OJ.

Adnan's Parents and Saad: Quit while you're ahead because you deserve to be in jail.

Bilal: if you limited your criminal activity to leaking grand jury information, you’d be doing less time. Your obsession with Adnan reminded me of the dynamic between the boy and the Giving Tree of the book of the same name by Shel Silverstein-- except in this version the tree has an agenda and secretly wants to fuck the boy. Apologies for forever ruining the beautiful parable of man's careless stewardship over the earth.

Islamic Society of Baltimore: instead of wasting another cent on Adnan’s defense, take stock in what he has already taken from you: 1. Money that he stole from your donation boxes (no, Rabia, all Muslim boys do not do this--only the souless assholes). 2. Money used to pay for hotel rooms for Adnan and Hae to hook up. Yep, the Grand Jury’s questioning of Bilal indicates that he frequently reserved hotel rooms on the ISB’s dime under his own name purportedly for "guest speakers." Adnan and Saad confirm that Adnan had sex with Hae in hotel rooms and you have to be at least 18 to rent a room in MD. Fake ID? You also have to be 18 to sign a cell phone contract and Adnan would have used one to get his cell phone if he had one. He didn’t use a fake ID. He used his Giving Tree...the one who signed the contract and paid for his cell service. The one he called when he was distraught over breaking up with Hae. The one who was his first call from jail after his arrest. The one who hired his lawyers and coordinated his defense. The one who organized the ISB fundraising effort to pay for those lawyers. The one who visited him in jail more than anyone who wasn't family or an attorney. The one who carried a photo of Adnan in his wallet when he was arrested for sexual misconduct with a minor. The one who is currently in jail for knocking out and sexually assaulting the patients at his dentist office. The one who served as the youth director at ISB for several years guaranteeing himself a steady stream of victims. The one to whom you gave authority to make hotel reservations on the ISB's dime for "guest speakers." But it is simply unthinkable that someone like that would try to ingratiate himself with the object of his obsession by booking hotel rooms to help Adnan have sex with his girlfriend, right? This is pretty easy to verify on the off chance that the ISB bucks the trend of most masajid and keeps good financial records. Check the dates in 1998 where the ISB was charged for hotel rooms when no out of town guest speakers were being hosted. Then check those dates against Hae’s diary for afternoon delights with Adnan in local hotels. Yeah, you paid for that. 3. The hundreds of thousands the ISB community already dumped into Adnan’s defense. 4. The thousands of hours the ISB families wasted writing letters of support, organizing meetings to protest Adnan's incarceration and praying for his release. You have given more than enough to this monster. Any additional funds should go toward counseling for Bilal’s victims that he preyed on while he was youth director at your masjid.

Adnan: I take back what I said in earlier posts. I don't care if you get a new trial, plead guilty, show remorse and apologize to HML's family. You will never apologize to CG and her family for falsely destroying her reputation after all she tried to do for you and for that you deserve to rot in prison for the rest of your life. Your mom, dad and best friend almost landed themselves in jail because of your stupid, murdering (or at least conspiracy to commit) ass. It’s nice that you’re a hafiz, but you also led prayers in Ramadan the day after you murdered the girl you were screwing in hotel rooms paid for by your masjid. More recently, as a hafiz, you had no problem bearing false witness against your dead attorney as indicated in this post. Thanks for proving that there is such a thing as crocodile qirat.

Adam Alter's book titled: "Irresistible, the rise of addictive technology and the business of keeping us hooked" for noting the addictive nature of the Serial Podcast and the fact that it provided no resolution. Ignoring the greater lesson being taught about addiction using the podcast as an example, I said, "fuck that," dropped the book and (re)embarked on this addictive voyage to find resolution.

Fellow redditors: you obsessive psychos (not a knock, I'm one of you) were critical in helping complete the above analysis by challenging my earlier posts through thoughtful and lively debate. I must now leave you all and emerge from the rabbit hole. Now where was I in Alter's book...?

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