I've been forced to go to Bicester Village by my girlfriend...
What's the quickest way of killing myself with the things available here lads?
Help me!
Posted Feb 17, 2019, 12:22 PM UTC
1834
If you're walking around bicester Village you are already dead.
19
Or Chinese
25
I'm sorry to hear that.
A Victoria Beckham box pleat mini skirt can be fashioned into a crude noose, twist around the changing room coat hooks.
18
Can you speak Mandarin? Good luck.
17
Have you tried acting like a shoplifter?
Don’t actually steal anything. That’s not good. But act suspiciously while you’re following her round.
See how many security guards you can annoy in one trip.
7
-
Hang yourself with an N Peal cashmere scarf
-
Stab yourself in the heart with the stiletto heel from a Jimmy Choo shoe.
-
Asphixiate yourself with a Christian Dior fur coat.
(BTW I think those three shops have the best stuff for buying your girlfriend pressents)
6
This is great news for you. This trip can be used as leverage next time you want her to do something you want and she doesn't.
5
If only that were true. :(
2
drum roll
Bicester Heritage Sunday Scrambles: dump one half of the family at the village while the others drive into an airfield at escape retail suicide for a day. I went with my cousins in January and it’s by far the most fascinating site to visit.
^^^un-official ^^^escape ^^^for ^^^men/women ^^^who ^^^need ^^^to ^^^just ^^^stare/touch/drool ^^^at/on ^^^cars ^^^for ^^^many ^^^many ^^^many ^^^hours ^^^with ^^^food ^^^trucks, ^^^coffee ^^^and ^^^an ^^^onsite ^^^brewery ^^^taproom ^^^thing. ^^^On ^^^a ^^^pristine ^^^example ^^^of ^^^a ^^^WW2 ^^^RAF ^^^Bomber ^^^Base.
6
No harm in trying.
1
Loose wall mountings according to that news story a few years back
3
There's a Burgerking by the roundabout on the way in so go & scoff your way to a heart attack. lol
3
We went there. By the time I'd managed to find somewhere to park the fucking car I wasn't in the mood to go shopping anymore.
2
Walk into Bicester and go to SPOONS
2
[removed]
1
No politics thanks.
1
Sorry!
1
itsu gives away their food at like half price a time (i think its an hour) before it closes if you're still there, also you get a chance to see people wearing questionable fashion
1
Le Creuset. Blunt force trauma.
I laughed but I'd bet that's a leading use for them. I'm convinced more are bought as wedding presents than for cooking. Barely used Le Creuset pan sets turn up on ebay constantly. Mine cost £60 and is in almost daily use. If cooking is your hobby, they're phenomenal value second-hand.
I once face planted into a Le Creuset after being tripped up by my cat and I can confirm it fucking hurts.
Being hit with one would probably kill you
Ouch. A couple of times I've lost my grip on one washing up, they destroy anything they land on. If I drop them, I leap backwards to get my feet out of the way and hope for the best.
I’m petrified of dropping them, they would probably obliterated my kitchen tiles. Touch wood it hasn’t happened yet
How to they hold up after being dropped?
Are you sure your cat isn't plotting to kill you?
All cats are plotting to kill us! It sounds like this one has moved out of the planning stage...
Definitely this! We have a pretty good collection of their stuff collected over the years and it's genuinely excellent, so it's a real shame to see them not used.
Parents are still using theirs that they got at their wedding, some 40-odd years later. Madness!
I've had mine five years now. They're used constantly but I'm certain they will outlive me.
Them, dualit stuff, and kitchen aids have an alarming resale value. Most maybe don't go below 1/3 under shop value.
IME pan sets like Le Creuset are usually collection only on ebay. Mine were the cheapest I've seen, but Ive also seen several sets with the rack (which I didnt get with mine) at < £100 starting bid
those dualit toasters and kettles are cracking though. mine makes toast perfect every time.
I have some that's really old and still outstanding. Love it.
I just got excited at the prospect of getting cheap pans.
Then thought about the p&p costs.
Save an eBay search with it filtered for Nearby and whatever distance you're prepared to travel and with email notification enabled and you'll see any that come up within that parameter. I waited 2 years for some to come up and I ended up being the only bidder. I've found two Le Creuset skillets and a terrine the same way since.
[deleted]
Ooh really? Brb looking it up.