Source
r/CircumcisionGrief•
LostLifeBrokenDreams

I'm currently engaged and am no longer sure if I can handle being in a relationship due to circumcision.

Anger and Grief

I suffer from suicidal depression, obsessive compulsive disorder, and ADHD

Antidepressants and therapy help me with everything but circumcision. It is the one thing that continues to haunt me through it all.

What makes coping so much more difficult is my relationship. I lost my virginity to this girl and I still remember the sheer disappointment I felt when we had sex for the first time. It was raw sex on top of it.

The worst part of it all is that I'm her first circumcised. The other men she had been with were all uncut.

When we had just met and were exchanging life stories she brought up some of her encounters with these men, so I know what she did with them and it kills me on the inside.

These men were able to experience all that there is with her. The full spectrum of pleasure. Not all the men were relationships, but casual. So, some guy she had no interest in dating got to experience it all with her, while me, the guy she loves and wants to spend the rest of her life with, gets the short end of the stick. I will never orgasm from a blowjob, never be overwhelmed with feeling during PIV. Nothing.

Sex is a very spiritual experience for me. I yearn for the closeness it brings and I feel truly connected with her while we have sex, but lately that connectedness has been cast out and shame, envy, anger, and suicidal thoughts has taken it's place.

I just want to be normal. I want to experience all life has to offer, but I never will.

I will never forgive my parents. They ruined me.

Posted May 9, 2019, 4:41 PM UTC · edited

266
FickleCaptain•

Perhaps you should look into non-surgical foreskin restoration to see if it is right for you.

http://www.restoringforeskin.org/beginners-guide-foreskin-restoration

10
cuddlychops06•

it's worth it!

6
LostLifeBrokenDreamsOP•

I'm not sure. I'm afraid of messing it up, and even if I don't I think I'll still have the fact that it isn't the real thing in my mind. Not a frenulum or Ridgid band. Just some stretched skin.

3
deja_ale•

It’s pretty hard to mess it up. It’s possible your perception of it may be true that it’s not the real thing. But on the flip side you will know how much better it is compared before you started, and if you do noting you will definitely continue to feel it’s not as good as the real thing. Men who restore have the possibility of enjoying their restored skin in a different way than an intact man because we know how much worse it could be and appreciate the improvements. An intact man never has the point of reference of being cut to appreciate the anatomy they have.

6
ChimelementaIntact Supporter•

That is what circumcision is actually meant for, repressing our sexual desires, 'curing' masturbation. All the medical justifications are frauds, the American medical groups already knew what they wanted and they manipulated the medical procedures. See the articles I have posted below, or just read what I wrote about them, I have no reason to give you false information do I?

PS I do not blame you for hating your parents. But if you are American, they probably did not knew what it actually meant and does. If it is in your religion, then they might had cultural pressure. It is just that the powerful can do whatever they want. And the most powerful nation in this world is US. If it was not for their medical propaganda and cultural conservatism(no hate to anybody. The modern generation of Americans itself is the single biggest weapon against this cruel practice. And that is what I can see is happening. This growing moment has reduced the percentage of infant circumcision to 50%, possible even lower know), this practice would have been made illegal long ago with FGM.

This article by John Ioannidis explains why medical researches can be false today.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1182327/?tool=pmcentrez

In this article Dr. Marcia Angell explains how easy it is to manipulate the results from RCTs.

https://www.nybooks.com/articles/2009/01/15/drug-companies-doctorsa-story-of-corruption/

Quoting my, and of many supporters of genital autonomy's favorite parts from the articles.

“It is simply no longer possible to believe much of the clinical research that is published, or to rely on the judgment of trusted physicians or authoritative medical guidelines. I take no pleasure in this conclusion, which I reached slowly and reluctantly over my two decades as an editor of The New England Journal of Medicine.”

​

it is often possible to make clinical trials come out pretty much any way you want, which is why it’s so important that investigators be truly disinterested in the outcome of their work.

​

The researchers in the three African RCTs were known pro-circs. And you can see what they did there.

5
throwaway__04848RIC•

The harsh truth. Circumcision is designed to attack our soul. And it succeeds.

4