How to fix things with my [24M] gf [20F] after I insisted that she not sleep over?

So for context, I had recently applied to an accounting firm in my town, and the interview was scheduled for today. It went well, I put my best foot forward, I'm optimistic about my chances. However, my relationship with my girlfriend may be in jeopardy.

Yesterday, my girlfriend of a year and two months decided to come over for dinner. We watched some movies, talked, and overall had a good time. I realize that it's getting late (about 10:30 EST.) Knowing very well that my ass had to be out of my apartment by 5:30 PM for the 45-minute drive to the firm, I had aimed to be in bed by 11 so I can get at least six hours of sleep in before the big interview. So I tell her my plan. She then looks at me and tells me that she was planning on "having fun with me" all night because she was off from her job the following day. Me, not expecting this at all, calmly reminded her that I had a really important job interview the following day and I needed to be focused and rested so I could do well. For whatever reason, this caused her to get closer to me and lay her head on my shoulder and told me that she really wanted me tonight.

On any normal day, I would have jumped at the chance to have her stay the night. But I really wanted to make sure that I secured this job as it would make me more financially secure. So I doubled down and told her as calmly as I could, that I would appreciate if she left and if we could pick back up tomorrow after the interview. And to my absolute surprise, she started to get really upset. Started raising her voice, about how I "care about the job more than her", and that "she really needed someone to spend the night with". From the year that we have been together, I was definitely shocked. She had never raised her voice in this manner, she was naturally a calm person. I continued to stand my ground, stating that I really needed this job and the least I need is for me to struggle to keep my eyes open because I stayed up all night with her.

We then engaged in a heated argument. While we were arguing, she started crying and started going on about how I was only "thinking about myself" and how I wasn't "accommodating her needs"? I once again tried to explain the importance of this job to both of us, and how we both would benefit from me landing it, because I would be making more money, to no avail. Once she realized that she wasn't getting through to me, she just gathered her belongings and stormed out of my apartment. At that point it was already quarter to 12, so I hustled to get ready for bed, just to wake up at 5 the next day. Got five hours of sleep, which wasn't what I had hoped for, but it was definitely better than what I would have had if she had slept over.

I texted her after the interview, and she's very livid about how I put my job over her. I'm unsure as to how to proceed next as I feel at this point I'm just repeating what I said the night earlier. First of all, was I wrong to say that she couldn't stay over for this reason? Was I being rational in my request? Next, what should I do from here? We've never hit such a low point in our relationship where she leaves my place in tears, so I'm concerned that this will impact our relationship in the long run.

Posted May 29, 2019, 12:57 AM UTC

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