Alcoholics and leg injuries, two stories

So, I have two stories to share here, they’re not connected but the one happened recently and reminded me of the other and I figured I’d share both.

Let’s start with the newer one.

I like to call it, “Bowling Blond Busts”. Our cast is Drunk Blond (DB) and my Coworker, Steve.

So, Steve is minding the desk, it’s late at night in the bowling alley and it’s a Thursday night so it’s relatively quite, save for our partnered bar (a separate business that we work closely with). This small chick, DB, wobbles up to the desk.

DB: What do you do if someone gets hurt?

Steve: We fill out an injury report. Are you hurt?

DB: Yeah.

Steve: So, what happened?

DB: I hurt my leg.

Steve: Alright, did you just do this?

DB: no, I hurt it like an hour and a half ago.

Steve: you should’ve told us! We could’ve helped you! How did you hurt it?

DB: whatever, I was hit by a bowling ball.

At this point Steve’s thinking that a bowling ball was launched from the the retriever or something.

Steve: How were you hit with a bowling ball?

DB: the ball hit my leg, duh

Steve: how did it hit your leg?

DB: ugh, I fell on the lane and then it hit my leg

Steve: did you hurt your leg when you fell?

DB: no! Are you even listening?! You’ve been being an a-hole to me all night! I’m going to come back with my parents and sue your a**!

Keep in mind, this is the first time he’s spoken to them since they came in and paid to bowl and Steve is the most patient guy I know.

Steve: so, you were laying on the lane and a ball hit you?

DB: yeah, my friend threw it at me!

Steve: Let me make sure I got this right, you stepped past the line, fell on the lane and then your friend decided to drill your leg with the ball?

DB: yeah, now are you going to compensate me or do I have to sue your a**!?

Steve:

Steve: it sounds like your friend is the a** so why don’t you sue him?

Cue DB cussing him out with the fury of hell itself. Steve kicked her and her friend out, they were both drunk out of their minds. She never came back with her parents either.

Tl;DR: Drunk girl steps onto the lane, falls and then her friend smashes her leg with a bowling ball and she demands that my coworker compensate her for her injuries.

Story numero two:

I call this one “Aunt Gets Greedy”

I have lots of aunts, all of them have problems but this one, this one is near the top of the list. She used to work at a bank (now she works for an mlm) and one day she decided to go to work at 5:00 am when employees were only supposed to come in at 6:30 am to open for 7:00 am. It was winter, it was icy and, being 5:00 am, no one had gotten out to ice the sidewalk yet. She ended up slipping on the ice and “hurting her leg”. She demanded the company they hire to salt, pay her for the damages to her leg. She makes a huge stink about it and files a law suit against them and despite it not being their fault, they offered to pay her $20,000 to settle. $20,000 was insanely generous considering it wasn’t even their fault but my aunt demanded to take them to court thinking she’d get them for millions. Before the court date, she went of vacation and went swimming with dolphins, during this, she hurts her leg and ends up needing surgery to fix it. Well, the court found out about this and her already pathetic case was pummeled into the ground. She ended up getting nothing, having to pay for the medical costs and the lawyer fees when she could’ve enjoyed a nice $20,000 that she didn’t even deserve.

Now she’s an alcoholic with a boyfriend whose just as trashy, they started dating while both of them were still married. I actually consider my aunts ex husband to be family more so than I do her despite them being divorced now. He’ll always be my favorite uncle. He spoiled her rotten and was an amazing dad to their three kids and his grandkids (whom some of them refuse to let their mother meet). He was really broken up about the divorce because he still loved her and actually wanted to try to work it out but she just wanted to run off with her (richer) boyfriend. I was really glad when he finally moved on, him and his new wife had a really beautiful wedding.

Tl;DR: My aunt hurts her leg and despite it being her fault, she tries to sue a company for it. They offer her $20,000 to settle but she takes them to court and loses because it was her fault and she went still on vacation and hurt her leg more.

The lesson here; don’t drink, kids.