Reddit, have any of you ever been abducted by aliens?
Posted Jul 7, 2010, 4:04 AM UTC
817
Nope.
6
Only the Reddit alien.
3
Is it really abduction if he has your consent?
1
He took my productivity.
4
OK, what is it with this crowd and their fascination with anal probes?
3
What is with aliens and their fascination with anal probing?
3
Are the Alien anal probes free? I mean, I gotta know the costs upfront... or are they a part of an Alien Anal Probe research study and they're free?
1
You also need to make sure your health insurance covers the procedure.
1
Who said anything about anal probes?
1
I am a real genuine alien, I swear after I... aww fuck it, you get where this is going.
I certainly haven't.
2
I wouldn't call it abducted.
2
[deleted]
2
I saw a UFO once. I was in my late teens. It was a clear and cool night, possibly during fall. I walked up my parents' lane road in the moon lit night near midnight. As I fired up a fat doobie, I saw it. Before I even got a hit I saw a light up in the clouds. But not just a light. It was a directional light, close to the clouds. It was inspecting the exterior of the cloud. If it was a ship, it must have been pretty small. The point of the light's origin was moving slowly, continuously, and constantly smooth, as the light purposely scanned the exterior of the cloud without a reasonable pattern.
About the time I took the first hit, the light swung down to me. It was like a spot light on a stage and lasted a fraction of a second, before the analysis continued on it's cloud inspection, without missing a beat, as if nothing happened.
I gave a stupid, stoned, laugh, and continued to smoke pondering the vastness of the world, enjoying the cool night's air, and thinking, life is good.
2
...Then I called my mom and my mom got scared and said you're moving with your auntie and uncle in Bel-air...
1
They couldn't get me over the border, so they had to let me go.
2
Spoiler alert: none of them have.
1
Oh, hey. It's ProbeMaster.
1
Yes. My cousin Juan took me on a wild ass road trip.