I dunno who am i (rant)

When i woke up.. I felt weird. Many emotions, thoughts and stuff.. I have depressonalization so it was it but.. I felt like i dint know who am i anymore.. I usually think what other think of me and what they want from me so.. I becone that.. I shouldnt but its very hard not to overthink if friends still wanna be with you so.. Without thinking i just kinda i guess push my thoughts away and pretend everything is fine... And be someone else than me kind of.. I know its not heatlhy but i dont know what to do.. I feel like im trapped inside of my own mind.. Like always worry and overthink.. Being angry at myself over tiniest mistakes being perfectionist.. Scared that i will ruin friebdships because of this... Scared of my own thoughts and feelings... I hate this but i dont know what to do..