Source
r/GenderCritical•
bladebreakers

Struggling with putting my thoughts into words: sexpats

DISCUSSION

I recently found out about a certain YouTube travel vlogger and his posts on PUA type forums talking in depth under a different name about which countries have the cheapest "pussy", how to "game" women and about all the sex he's had in poor "shithole" places. He talks about having sex with and "seducing" women and girls in their late teens to early twenties, among others.

I feel absolutely disgusted and enraged, that a 40 some year old man sees nothing wrong with this and has in fact turned his life into nothing but "game."

I despise sexpats more than anything because they are manipulative and exploitative of women who are in rough financial situations, not to mention that a lot of them take advantage of white worship that gets done in many parts of the world, such as Asia, for example. When I try to verbalize all this, though, the responses I hear tend to be "it's sleazy but nothing bad. It's consensual sex between legal aged partners, so what is the problem?"

Obviously there is a coercive, manipulative element to this. This guy, and other sexpats like him, take advantage of poor, struggling, often naive young girls and women. They view women as nothing but holes to fuck, that is all.

How can I express this better?

It gets even trickier when I look at other pick up artist forums about how much "pussy" men can get by using various techniques and how showcasing that you're very rich makes women gravitate to you. How do I argue against this? Why are these awful people "successful" at all? I guess in the case of people closer in age to one another, where the woman also enjoys sex with this man, it's less awful somehow? I have no issue with women enjoying sex (of course they should!) but the planning and manipulating and lying with the agenda of getting into a woman's pants disgusts me immensely. Am I crazy? Why do the women who have sex with these people have sex with them? Why do women in their 30s and 40s, successful, established women have sex with these disgusting, predatory men?

I read post after post of women sleeping with these awful people, wanting commitment, etc and I can't help but screaming in my head: WHY? I wouldn't want anything to do with a man like this no matter how good looking or rich he was. What am I missing?

I apologize for the rant. I honestly feel so disgusted and disturbed. Comments after comments that it was only natural for men to want sex with young women or how traveling around for sex is nothing strange or wanting to "increase your game" is a perfectly rational goal to pursue.

Posted Oct 24, 2019, 4:21 PM UTC

6113
LandisRiv•

It's disgusting. They're manipulating women who are poor. They don't have a choice because they need cash. It's assault dressed up as chat lines.

There was a guy arrested and jailed in England, some loser in his 40s who encouraged other guys to approach actual highschool girls as targets. When they said they were literal kids, it made him more persistent. He got them alone, touched one and tried to kiss them. 16 year old girls! They're like children! It's sick.

Guys doing this and encouraging this are predators who purposely go after vulnerable teens or women because they know they won't be rejected as much.

It's like this sick creeps who go to poorer places looking fir children and barely legal teens.

They should all be locked away.

29
bladebreakersOP•

The thing that boils my blood is that they never will get locked away though. Just cheered on.

7
darkadaptedeyez•

YouTube should ban channels promoting sex tourism. Many underdeveloped countries have epidemic levels of sex slavery among women and children.

18
grimreapersdtrLorena Bobbitt now, ask later•

Yes. Isn’t this illegal in most countries?

4
marysia94•

2 things:

  1. You will never be able to change these men’s mind on this, and it will send you mad if you try. These men and their defenders are disgusting, immoral people, and it doesn’t matter how well you explain yourself, they aren’t going to stop being misogynists. I am not saying this to discourage you. I have the exact same feelings as you do about it. It’s revolting, it damages my soul just to witness it. But these men are not going to change and you will only hurt yourself if you continue to take notice of them.

  2. A lot of what they get up to is completely made up or exaggerated. Not all of it - the terrible stuff really does happen - but these losers are some of the biggest fantasists on planet Earth. I’ve lived in russia (and visited other eastern bloc countries) and holidayed in Thailand, which are full of this type of man, and they’re the most pathetic people I’ve ever met. Delusional, full of impotent rage and complete liars. If you are reading PUA blogs on the internet, stop. Most of them are completely full of shit. They’re completely sold on the myth of the Slavic sex goddess, or the submissive southeast Asian girl, and they try and perpetuate it to other loser men as much as they can. I know that I might sound very callous towards the poor women who do get sucked in, but honestly don’t bother getting upset over pond scum like this.

17
adventurousnipple•

This! Life gets much easier when you realize it's not your responsibility to educate men.

It's... an admirable goal, but we already get enough gaslighting and abuse from them just for existing. Their problem isn't that they just haven't heard the right argument yet. If it was that simple, we wouldn't still be here.

Just focus on uplifting other women. We have to help us, not help them help us.

12
[deleted]•

I'm sorry to say this, but the women over there unaware need to get hip to the game regardless of their status. Men are predators and that is that. And of course the latter points you made about male nature are how they see it, they don't care about the woman, they only care about what they can get out of her (sex and house slave/broodmare if they marry her and bring her back stateside). A lot of these women already know the score and they use these fools to get a green card and then come to the USA and set up her own business, go to school, find work and prosper. In the case of those women, I say more power to them. I applaud them for reversing game like a true G.

12
GCMadamXXWomen Create Life•

Once when I was a young woman I picked up a hot guy at a bar (I'd met him a few times before I think) because he had a nice car. He took me home and wanted to sleep over because he lived far away. I told him fine but we weren't going to have sex. He said fine. We made out for a while and went to bed and made out some more.

He was trying to get me to agree to sex, but not in a dangerous way or anything. I wasn't scared, or even annoyed. I was having fun kissing and cuddling. Anyway, at a certain point he said to me "I have very strong feelings for you. Very strong feelings." And I remember thinking "Do you really expect me to fall for that line? How stupid do you think I am?"

But I think a lot of women are exactly that stupid.

A professor tried to weasel his way into a relationship with me by doing me academic favors and paying for me to go to a conference. I took the favors went to the conference and then dropped his stupid class. What a dork.

Pretty sure other young female students were exactly stupid enough to fall for it though.

I could go on and on about this. One of the biggest challenges for feminism is to give girls and women the emotional and intellectual tools to not fall for this bullshit. But honestly, sometimes I don't even know where to start.

10
adventurousnipple•

I think that sadly a lot of young women, whether the're aware of it or not, really feel like they owe these men something in return. Add in female socialization into the mix, some self objectification, maybe a dash of low self-esteem too, and it's no wonder that many give in so easily.

12
[deleted]•

[removed]

1
bladebreakersOP•

I think you are on to something here. Calling men out isn't enough, it is high time we criticize and change the way we raise girls and teach young girls and women to relate to the world, to themselves, to sex, to men, etc. I don't know if stupidity is the right word because it's more that women are raised and conditioned into docility so they can not fight back against their oppression. I despise this cutesy type parallel but I think of it like declawing a kitten. I think the equivalent of that is what is done to young girls and women and we won't get anywhere unless that changes.

Thank you for bringing this up. It's an important perspective because we as a group need to stop pushing for men to change and start changing women.

7
darkadaptedeyez•

Also, I think we need to pass legislation that makes sexual fraud a crime. This means if you deceive and manipulate a woman into believing you want a relationship when all you're doing is using deception to coerce someone into sex, you should be charged with a crime. Battery or fraud. This can be supported by evidence in the form of text messages, PM's, etc. It's a violation and needs to stop.

9
RadfemXX__r/FeminismoRadical•

Am I crazy?

No

6
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1
TheDeadlyZebra•

I think there is a female fantasy of taming the immoral sex-crazed wild man. Knowledge of his depravity indeed encourages certain women to pursue him, as his luck with other women is presumed to translate into competence and social influence.

Often, sex can function as a type of lottery. For example, I have known guys that got married to women that they at first considered a one-night-stand. Perhaps women that become victims to sexpats are subconsciously desiring to submit themselves to this lottery system.

1