Difficult to Sleep

Lately at night I've noticed it's a little difficult to get to sleep. I've developed a small routine for the first time before I go to bed. Normally a person will wash their face, check for possible blemishes, brush or floss their teeth, etc. But not my routine.

Every night after keeping myself up well beyond my desired bed time, I get up and check for the outside door to make sure both locks are secured. Unfortunately for me my roommate has already gone to sleep, so there the common area is devoid of light and no switch to remedy this problem. As a result, I've used binoculars to check the orientation of the lock handles, but even then I expect to see shadows dance when I remove the lenses.

I've digressed, my apologies. My routine consists of first closing the main door to my room, then checking the two small closets attached to my room and shutting their doors. Once that's done, I go to the bathroom, peer around the back of the door and behind the shower curtain, turn off the light and quickly close the door. Once all four doors are closed, I feel a little at ease and open up the blinds to let in the moonlight before turning off the main lamp.

Once in bed, I lay on my back with head above the covers and let my eyes adjust to the moonlight. My eyes sometimes play tricks with me, translating simple shadows under the door to dark sinister monsters lurking behind the closed door. If I leave a door open (which usually happens to be the bathroom door), I think smile.dog is waiting for me. If I glance over at the ajar door, I can see smile.dog's eyes glowing from the shadows and his pointed teeth glistening in the pale moonlight. I can feel his horrible visage boring chilled holes deep through my soul. I try to tell myself that smile.dog does not exist, though unfortunately for me, my imagination wins out over my normal senses. Like a small kid, I pull the blankets over my head for protection. If a monster can't see me and if I don't move, then I'm completely safe. Those are the rules.

This worked just fine and I would stay curled up, albeit overheating, and drift off to sleep. I'd wake up the next morning feel fine and refreshed, having survived the night and my overactive imagination. With a small stretch and a jump out of the bed, I'm ready to confront the bright day devoid of any silly childhood monsters. I check any opened doors and all closed doors, happy again that nothing creepy such as smile.dog is lurking within my residence.

One night after some a large consumption of alcohol, I decided to get some rest. I let my roommate and our friend who stayed the night over that I, being completely coherent and full of awesome, shall retire for the evening. I merrily walked into my room, closed all the doors, and promptly snuggled under my bed with my head propped once again above the covers and fell asleep. I had no worry of silly childhood monsters again, why would I? Alcohol makes you strong and fit, like a true man! I was a true man and no longer a boy, monsters should fear me!

I opened my eyes to that feeling. It's the same feeling that you get when something is wrong and you can't quite put your finger on it. Somehow during the night, I had managed to put the covers over my head and I was balled up in a fetal position. I didn't know why I did this but it just felt right, like I had to do it. I tried not to move as my overactive brain tried to make sense of this strange, ominous feeling. I began to worry if maybe the alcohol was starting to make me feel sick, and perhaps I should seek the aid of the porcelain goddess.

Do you know that sound of something sinister walking deftly on carpet? The faint sound that causes your ears to perk up in the night and trigger the adrenaline rush of fear within your brain? That's the same sound I heard that moment. I began to sweat and tremble, sitting as motionless as I could as I waited for that next sound. My anxious nerves did not have to wait long, as I heard it again, and slowly again.

The feeling of something being nearly on top of me was present. I felt as if I could pull the covers back just ever so slightly, I would see a mass of shadow directly on top of me. Perhaps a rotting eye of a ghoul or the soulless holes of a banshee hovering above me. I tried to force myself to sleep, anything to get my mind off of things. I didn't care if the monster would flay me in my slumber, being dead and asleep is better than being awake and terrified. I could almost feel the cold presence of this creature, sucking the very life out of the room and soon, me. The air around me began to feel cold and my sweat felt like ice to my feverish skin. I wanted to throw the bed covers off of me to cool off but the monster would get me.

The blankets were my only protector between this horrible abomination and defenseless me. Without my blankets I would not have survived the night, despite waking up in a puddle of sweat and a need to check every room with a flashlight. I sat on the bed and gave my linens a hug, despite how silly it looked to my wandering roommate.

After a nice relaxing evening out of the apartment, I said good night to my roommate and went back to my room. I closed off all the doors, turned off the light, and sat on the bed. Somehow I didn't notice that all of the bedsheets were missing except for my mattress cover. Somehow I also seemed to miss closing the bathroom door, even though I thought I had just taken care of it. I couldn't help but look into the shadow of the restroom before I curled up in a fetal position in the corner of the bed, hiding myself under my pillow as best as I could.

It's a little difficult to sleep at night.