To the redditor that sent me gummy bears for arbitrary day...

Were the laced with poison? I ate every last one of them and I occasionally think I'm going to die of a mysterious disease given to me by some creeper. I think you were from Atlanta, GA, which puts us both in the Southeast. You probably made up the return address anyways. Oh well, I'm still going strong and so is my wife (she probably ate more of them than myself).

You sent a Toy Narwhal, a bag of pedobears (http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/images/B000EVOSE4/ref=dp_image_0?ie=UTF8&n=16310101&s=grocery), and a book on Bacon. I'll send you pictures if I ever find out who you are.