Help! I want to turn my relationship with my GF just into Friends. Bacon and Beer cornerstone at stakes here (and feelings)!

I don't know were to turn to as my friends, family, and co-workers are too biased to give me good input. Here goes:

I met my girlfriend at work, a co-worker set us up. Our first date was pretty platonic, no kiss or nothing; we just drank beer outside and talked all night. It was great and had a great time. Our next date, we ended up in sleeping together. Things just snowballed really quickly and now we are a couple. This has been 4 months now.

One night she made me a bacon feast, everything bacon. It was awesome. And she loves beer. She is a lightweight but we still lightly drink together, very nice. She is agnostic and has a very high sex drive. Oh, I thought I found the “one”. Oh, she is highly educated too; bonus.

After the first month she was telling me she loved me. I guess I love her too as a friend but AM NOT IN LOVE WITH HER! But I responded to her, “I love you too” because then that is a big Matzah ball hanging out there. As I lie to her, I die a little inside because I am not in love with her and feel really bad about it. This still is happening now and don't know how to stop, I don't want to hurt her. I do really care for her! And I do like her.

Within the second month of dating She asked me about moving in with her and marriage too; I have no intentions of that just yet. This is on the second month of knowing her. I told her it was too soon and I would know within a years time; this satisfied her. She has been very “clingy” and it feels like she is smothering me. I no longer enjoy Fridays now because I am dreading having to spend the whole weekend with her. It's not that I don't enjoy her company but I need my alone time to recharge (I do IT and it's stressful). I end up having a good time with her but would rather just be at home or hanging out with friends. She doesn't seam to understand this even though I have tried to explained it a few times.

When we kiss, there are no “fireworks” for me. This has been true to EVERYTIME I have kissed her. It has become a chore for me now. I really don't want to make out with her, that is just something that doesn't feel “right”. At first I thought it was just me, that I needed time to adjust to having a GF. It just doesn't work for me the way it should. A giant RED FLAG here.

Sex has become a problem for us within the third month of dating. I have a high sex drive as does she. One of my requirements of a GF is frequent sex as her too. At first we were going at it all the time (everyday to every other) but lately not so much. My GF is overweight, not a problem for me, I want to think. She is the heaviest girl I have been with ever, I am guessing around 375 pounds, at 5'6”. I weigh around 200 and am 5'8” so I am not skinny either... but I can't even lift her and I am decently strong. My previous GF's have been average to petite in size, what I prefer. But I am not a vain person so I convince myself this isn't an issue and she IS “trying” to loose weight. Maybe it this will change if she does loose weight? Maybe it's just an adjustment that we can work out? I'll get used to it or work it out together, I tell myself; not a problem.

I am a pretty kinky guy and want to do all sorts of sexual stuff, just about up for anything. She is pretty conservative in bed and just thinks some things are gross, like anal or bsdm. She will only have sex in the bedroom, where is the excitement there? I don't think she will try anything new or kinky (insert fetish here) with me. I wonder if that could change, I doubt it.

She does like to give me head, anyone would think that is a good attribute. But I just don't like it from her, I try to direct her to what I like but it doesn't work. She just ends up trying too hard, I think and it doesn't feel good. It just turns me off. This is a pretty big red flag here. I remember when getting head was one of my favorite things. Ohhh, this just isn't right.

Since she has a large body it is very hard to get into very many sexual positions. We only do it missionary and her on top due to this limitation. We have tried a few variations that just don't work with our bodies. I don't like her being on top; due to the awkward body position I tend to slip out and just grind her stuff outside not realizing that I am not inside her anymore; then it hits the wrong spot and bends my penis. PAIN! This is when I go soft and she is still going hard; it scares me and hurts. At first I would just keep going, get hard again and reinsert inside her. That is not working now. Normally girl on top is my FAVORITE sexual position but not with my current GF.

As of the last month (3 months into the relationship) I have no desire to have sex with her anymore (and I am a horny). It's hard (no pun intended) to get my manhood up for her. I guess the whole kissing thing is absent for my arousal which is a major issue for me (I have not told her this due to being scared of hurting her feelings). Currently I prefer fapping to having sex with her. That is just fucked up and I know it.

A little background info on me, I have been wanting a girlfriend for quite some time. It had been 3 years since the last one completely broke my heart and I was finally doing great being single for 2 years. I was very happy being single but I do want a girlfriend/eventually wife. Now I have a GF that I don't enjoy sexually but really like her as a friend. We also work at the same place, well she is currently in an office an hour away but she is making friends with my co-workers. And she just got a new position in the company, that I helped her get; that puts her in a home office but closer to the main office where I work. I don't want to come off as a jerk to my co-workers (or my GF) either as she is getting to know them and they like her. She is pretty cool.

A little about her: She lost her daughter to heart disease, not married and no father in the picture, 2 years ago. She is still devastated about it. I know she will probably never get over it. She has a really low self esteem and is on meds. I just like her and want to be there for her. At first I didn't think anything of this. But now I don't want to push her over the edge. She isn't crazy or anything (I know crazy as my ex-wife was bi-polar) but I don't want to add to her problems. I don't know what to do or how to fix this.

I have never been in this position before, it's usually the other way around. She is in love with me and I just like her (not in love at all and don't see it ever happening). I want to break up with her but don't want to loose her as a friend. I really like her a lot as a friend. I am pretty sure she will hate me if I come clean with her and don't think we can just be friends but that is what I want. We are co-workers too so that complicates things as well. I don't want to hurt her but know I have to. I am afraid to tell her all of this due to her fragile ego. I don't want to be the bad guy and fuck her over but I need to do what is right for me. I want to be in love and have kids but not with her (sic?). Help me!

TL;DR I just want to be just friends with my girlfriend. I don't feel romantic about her at all but have been trying. I feel trapped and starting to get depressed about it. How can I break up with her and remain friends? Is it possible or just deal with loosing her? Thank you for your constructive input!